So, kids have a way of getting right to the heart of the thing
My lovely daughter just told me that she saw the, “younger, skinnier, more beautiful version of me” on the beach in Michigan. She was wearing a black bathing suit and had clear skin and the skinny body with the same kind of black hair that I had, when I used to get my hair colored black. My daughter said she saw this woman, and was so surprised because it looked so much like me, that she just stared at her until the woman started looking back at her like she might be crazy.
So I guess that’s nice. (?).
However…since I was eating at the time of this news flash, and I caught a completely unintentional glimpse into my fattiness, I proceeded to go ahead and finish all the crap in the house that I like (that would be White Castle’s, Kettle Cooked Potato Chips and Oreo’s–luckily there was only a little of each). And now I will finish the bottle of wine I opened 2 days ago. Because tomorrow, in addition to my RUN (National Running Day! Click it or check the next post and get in on the fun!), I have to re-boot my dietary intake. And by re-boot, I mean drink only water and starve myself for 3 weeks or so. I have 18 days to become the younger, skinnier, more beautiful version of myself!
That’s healthy right?
I’m not really going to starve myself. That would actually be impossible. I really like food. And I get really hungry and pretty crabby when I’m trying to be “good”. So I’ll just make better choices in the next 18 days. (I picked 18 because of the Warrior Dash. It’s in 18 days so I’m going to use that). It’s a short, attainable amount of time. And if I want to eat a bunch of crap I can do it after the race!
First side note: I also want to clarify, that even though I suggested that my daughter was calling me fat by using some kind of psychologic, mind-bend to passively indicate beauty is equated with thinness and youth, she DID NOT intentionally mean to make me feel bad. She was just telling a funny story and I added all the rest! She even said, “I guess that lady couldn’t have been more beautiful than you, because she looked just like you.” And that’s a direct quote.
Healthy. Unhealthy. Exercise. Sloth. Water. Alcohol. This site is all over the place. I can’t decide to be good or bad. Everything in moderation and add some activity! That’s probably good enough.
**On a second, side note: I had to have lost a few pounds today just from pure sweat and suffering. That rainstorm never did pan out for us and it’s been sweltering here all day. It’s good and hot in the house now. Everyone looks droopy, like water starved weeds. Still not turning it on though. That’s probably going to be a fight later when the BF gets home. Hopefully once he gets going on the topic, the heat will press down on him, crushing his urge to argue and squashing his ability to fight back. He will collapse in a heap of wilty protestation, and me and the kids can drag him to the bedroom and let him sleep it off. It’s always cooler at about 3 am so I don’t know what everyone is complaining about! All that whining about winter and how cold it is…blah blah blah…well, it’s HOT now!! Enjoy!
Alright I better go. I have to call in a take out order for dinner. So healthy!
Running!….is NOT what I am doing…
Plodding. Staggering. Hobbling. Half-stepping. Walking. Limping. Collapsing. Crawling…to a shaded area and sitting. Pretending to remove phantom rocks from my shoes. So sad.
I started on Monday like the original plan dictated, but I just now have recovered the strength to type about it.
Well, not really…but close. At this very moment I am trying to cool down and lose the sweatiness from my legs so I can put pants on to go to the store. And that is no lie. I forgot a few things yesterday for our “health plan” and I want to go get them before the kids get back from school. I have shorts but my legs are a bit too white and stubbly and I have long workout/sweat pant/joggy things that I would never wear outside to a public store-like place. I need some cute capri-type casual slip on pants of a comfortable material that is flattering yet stylish. Hmm. I was at Target yesterday too (the store of everything) but focused on my daughter and groceries. Maybe tomorrow. I can’t walk thru there again so soon. Plus I have to go to Jewel, the actual grocery store. Sometimes you just have to. Sorry Target.
Anyway, I am still serious. Let me run it down for you. Monday. Kids to school…drove to the outdoor trail. Nice and early. 9 am. Crowded, which is good because then you have less chance of being assaulted or injured. Not that it’s dangerous, it’s lots of seniors and workout people and even a Forest Preserve Police presence, but it’s ALWAYS dangerous for women alone in woodsy settings. Plus if you fall or heatstroke out or something, lots of people to call 911 for you! Back to this gripping tale…it’s still hot here in Chicago, like summer hot, in the 80’s to 90’s every stinking day now, it’s really ridiculous actually because it’s no joke what they say about our area here; it was literally like 40 degrees one day and 90 the next. I’m not sure how it keeps happening and why we are never prepared and I have lived here my whole life…anyway, so it’s hot, but I figured it’s also 9am, so it won’t be THAT hot. WRONG. It felt like the fires of Hell were chasing me around that trail and I could not get out of its path for nothing. I managed to stagger around the trail, in shade and out, for a grand total of 1 and ¼ miles before I gave up and walked/ran for the rest of the 3.6 miles. I am not proud or happy about it, but I could not pull up enough strength to keep “running”. I could not even do a jog. My legs felt like the leadiest lead in the world and it was SO hot!! I also never used to have a problem with heat either, I was the last hold out for air conditioning and I was sincere. It really never used to bother me, but now I can barely stand in front of the oven without complaining. So needless to say, I was sweating, and I never sweat like all that, and I wanted to sit down so bad in the grass, and there was goose poo and deer poo and snakes and ducks and who knows what else kind of poo all over that trail. But I really didn’t care. The only thing that stopped me was the fact that I was on the part of the trail that follows to major roads, so there is no tree cover on the street side and the sun is blazing right in your direction, into the tree line so, basically there is no shade until you get back into the woody area. From about the 2 mile mark until the 3 mile mark I was out there, roasting, baking, shriveling and dying in the sun like a juiceless raisin. Ugh. My worst workout ever. I am so pathetic that I tried to stay next to the trees even though there was no shade, but I felt that just being closer to them might make me feel cooler. Not so. But I did keep going. I walked and sipped my water which was warm at this point but still watery, and just willed myself to keep moving forward, try not to look like you are actually weaving on the trail, and take deep breaths and let that heart rate go down, let that body cool off, just make it to the car, and hope you can drive without passing out. It felt kind of like being drunk but without the fun of alcohol or throwing up thank goodness! I never wanted to puke so I consider it a win! I ended up finishing in about 50 minutes so looking back it wasn’t that desperate, but it did feel like slow motion death.
When I got home, I took a shower and tried to remove leg stubble but I think I caused a rash with the chemicals and the heat skin I inflicted on myself. So whatever…White and hairy it is for another week. Luckily Tuesday my daughter Stevie (hey girl! cutie! with the free arm!!) had to go to the doc to get that cast off her arm! She was happy, and I was happy because we got to spend the whole day doing the opposite of exercise. After two hours of removing the cast, x-rays, and returning to the doc to get the all clear, she is good to go for now, no more cast but no kind of activity that would cause a fall or a chance to land on the arm again and potentially break it all over for 4 weeks when we go back to check it one last time! Hooray, now we can go have LUNCH! We love the Mexican food, El Famous Burrito, I think they are in lots of places…really good if you like this kind of food. We particularly like the Chicken Quesadillas. The best, hands down, you may have had anywhere. They’re not on the menu you just have to ask…so worth it. Then the usual guac, salsa, beans (all made on site–so always delicious and always just a little different) We go to one in particular, so I can’t speak for all, but if you like it or try it…let me know! I’d love to hear from other fans.
Anyfood…back to the story…we eat and hit the Target. Stevie wants some capri’s she saw and needs a shirt for the WW2 Veterans Honor Assembly she is part of and has been practicing for the last month. I am so proud that she is so part of her school and all its activities. These are meaningful things and I like when the kids know it and understand that the world is so much bigger than just them and their lives. But let’s not get all teary eyed now…stay focused on my detailed list of MTW…ok still Tuesday…at the Target. Successful shopping. Alot of money is spent. Besides not having food in the house…I have kind of let it get to the point where we have literally just those things I listed yesterday. Like, nothing. You have to eat a hot dog bun with Ranch dressing, seriously. Hot lunch at school and take out dinner. NOT healthy, not good, not cheap. Thank goodness my kids eat minimal breakfast. Fruit Loops out of the box is usually good enough. Besides not having food in the house, we need to have “healthy” food in the house. It is not cheap, and it requires more steps to eat. Like cooking, peeling, combining….it’s such a hassle and that’s why I can’t manage it during school. One day…they say it takes 6 weeks to keep to a routine before it becomes a natural part of life, and 3 months for it to stick permanent…I hope so…that’s just about how much time I have to make it work this time. So, food is bought. Put away. Made dinner. I grilled. Used the grill. I have a crazy fear of it for some reason. Fire and all that…but I managed to do it, and I will continue to do it now. The kids like it way better than the oven and it keeps the heat outside. So blah blah, watched tv, went to bed. Big finish there. Sorry.
Now it’s Wednesday, and I really do have to get my butt to the store. Time is ticking and I want to be back before the kids. It’s still hot. I know, no one can probably believe this. But it’s true. I sent the boy to the bus, and walked Stevie (her idea) and a good one, because it loosened up my legs just enough so that I didn’t look like a complete handicap trying to “run” around the trail. It was not pretty. And I did not complete the circuit. Again. I hate my out-of-shape self. It also doesn’t help when you have some Marine guy running around the track, looking all buff and Marine-y, passing you twice going in the other direction! And he wasn’t even from around here. He’s driving around in his big, red, truck with out-of-state license plates. Marines. Showing up in Illinois and exercising just to make us look bad! Plus, I have the pressure of the Warrior Dash on the 19 th of June. It’s looking like a Warrior Dud. I am going, but it will not be mighty. As for today, I started off strong, said to myself, slow and steady. Slow and easy. Just casually go around the track. No rush. Just run it nice and easy. Nice and easy. Nice and easy. And it worked! I made it all the way to the 2½ mile mark! That is right in the middle of the sun spot. No cover. Someone kindly repainted the mile markers in bright red numbers. Nice and big and correctly I assume. They are not in the same places as the previous markers painted in yellow. Turns out each quarter mile is just a little bit farther than they were on Monday. But I really did make it to the 2½ spot and I tried for more, but I couldn’t do it. I half-jogged it every few paces but I was pretty much done for. At the 3½ mark I kicked it up for that .10 mile and brought it home. Too bad I had to park my car near the entrance today, so I had to walk even more just to collapse out of sight of the more athletic types who were just dashing around looking all happy and fit. Next week. Next week.
Again, not happy. But it is pretty funny and it makes a good story. Isn’t it better than, “Oh today, Monday, ran 4 miles. Tuesday, ran 4 miles. Wednesday, ran 6 miles and did an obstacle course…blah blah…” My version has that gritty-real-life-down-in-the-streets kind of attitude. (Because I am gritty, from being, literally, down in the street, weak and tired).
Also, in my defense, I am on the pre-week of my “cycle”, notoriously makes me exhausted and hungry and not able to do alot of energy requiring things. I hate when it coincides with my plans for higher living, and race events like the Dash or the 5-Mile. Next week though will be different. I tend to be a heavy “exit-er” (if you catch my drift without me being too graphic on the technical details part) but I get my energy back and I’m not hungry. So I should just be flying around that trail with no trouble at all!
On a happy note, I have maintained my weight for one whole week despite the period problem. So that’s really good. Course it does help that every time you step outside lately the sun and heat suck away all the moisture you have in, on, or near your body.
So I am all cooled down and my pants will probably slip on now…I had eaten a sammy (healthy bread, turkey, lettuce, tomato, onion–love the onion–not good for the breath tho) and a banana, felt like vomiting…for real. I held it in. And I think I’m good to go there too. I would have been so mad. I haven’t made an actual sandwich for myself, like that kind with stuff on it, for a long long time and I would have been super-mad if I just threw it all up. But I am better now.
It’s one p.m. in the city. I will be back later with some coins and cars and pictures. I’ll probably throw something on top of this…but I don’t know what yet. It will be a surprise for all of us!
Enjoy the sun, apparently it’s here to stay! Toodles.
Early Christmas Eve…
8 am Chicago time. It’s about 32 degrees and drizzling the best icy rain you can get anywhere in the midwest. I know all around us gets snow but we get rain that freezes everything in its place. It looks pretty, covering all in a transparent shell, but it is hell to walk or drive on. Still, it’s peaceful. I’m inside though. In a few hours the two day blitz starts and for my kids this year they have three days of travel…it just worked that way. They are ready. We stayed up late making food for the days to come, mock chicken legs (its a polack thing–so delicious–always tweaking the formula trying to get them to taste just like my dads–they never do), pierogis, apple slices, cookies, the usual, just like you!…so I am enjoying the silence for a few more minutes. Drinking some coffee, of course, just thinking about…how nice it all is. To be mostly healthy, mostly happy and able to enjoy the small things, not just today, but everyday. I’m not really religious or spiritual much, but I wish the same for you. Have a safe journey if you are traveling around, or a nice warm drink for me if you’re not!, and thanks for spending a few minutes with me and mine today!
Yes, it's a white tree. Hello...Polish....we like it. And it fits in our limited space! It's pretty when its lit up which you will see later today. We keep the lights on all night tonight....
just shy of pretty 