I’m So Jeep In Love Right Now
I’m a little obsessed right now. I’m clinging to my Jeep because it sits faithfully in the parking lot overnight at my new job waiting for me to return every morning. I work nightshift now. No matter how stressed I feel in the hospital, I am instantly better when I see my baby outside, just a few feet from my exit. My heart literally beats with relief some days for this tether to my normal world. I realize I tend to get “attached” to things, but then what the hell is the upside of having OCD if you can’t spread that obsessive love around to a few of your favorite inanimate objects. At least it’s not black tar heroin. Right? Which reminds me. I got a tupperware bowl of change, money change, coins, a drug addicts dream, just sitting around in my room, on my dresser. It’s all the loose change that’s been collected in the last few years. Yes. Last few years. Pause for effect. Years. (I told you OCD. I’m really committed to my causes). So, yes, I still collect this money whenever I see it on the ground. My kids and the BF still do it too. Apples and trees ya know. Ingrained training. In true OCD fashion I will be separating it all by coin and bill first, and then posting the total. It’s really really dirty too. I should probably wear gloves. And spoiler alert, we found a one hundred dollar bill in the Home Depot parking lot a few years back. I actually gave that money to the kids to spend, but it’s in the tally, making the grand total, from numerous years of shameless money scrounging, somewhat impressive I think. I don’t even have a ballpark figure because I pretty much lost track years ago. It just gets dumped into the bowl. It’s more than 100 though. Anyway you’ll have to wait another day, because it is going to take a bit of time to sort this out. If I was super interactive, and better at the internet, I’d set up some kind of poll and entertain comments with guesses at the total. I could even offer some kind of incentive. A prize cut of this filthy, grimy money. But I’m not that good. And that would drag this process out even longer. Looking back on all these words, I think I’ve probably typed enough for today. Now that I’m back on the post boat, every day can be a new opportunity to share all my deep thoughts with a few unsuspecting readers, in long, drawn out, run-on sentences. Or very short sentences. With lots of punctuation. Love long sentences and short sentences. Love commas and periods. For sure we are done here today. Thank you if you made it this far. Stay tuned please. Jeep is Life. Later.
My Site For The Last Few Years
Welcome. My brain has been a brick wall. For years. But. Someone has been visiting this tired site faithfully. Thank you. Life has rolled on. The kids are adults. Nearly 21 and 20. Yes. With interesting, independent lives. I have a new job. More free time. Same BF though (thank god). And a birthday very soon. I’m feeling the changes. Let’s revamp the site. Catch up. Figure out the next chapter. Figure out how to get these words out there. Updates are all around. So stay tuned. Here we go…
Everything Is Gonna Be O-Kizz-Ay
It’s February. It’s Super Bowl! (In about 18 hours–Peyton! Go Bronco’s!) I finally, kinda, sorta, feel like I might be back on track to have a job and a life that actually entertains outside interests. Maybe. I am giving it a test-go right here. It’s been snowing every other day with periods of sub-zero temps in between and it feels like I drive to work on the ice roads of Alaska instead of the ice roads of Illinois. Big difference. Except that it’s actually warmer, with less snow, in Alaska right now. Of course. Anyway, first post back and I’m not going to type on and on. This is from the Zoo. Yes. We are crazy in Chicago. We go to the zoo, in the winter time, with the intentional and specific purpose of walking around in the dark and cold and snow to see the lights and take a few pictures. FYI, it was actually like, negative 5 (that’s 5 below zero) with a healthy breeze, this day that I went. Alcohol was my friend. Didn’t feel a thing. In fact, I’m drinking right now, after being in the house all day, while 6 more inches of pure frozen hell fell to the ground and covered the other 6 inches we already had. Here’s to the rest of the year. Looking back and catching up. Thanks for hanging with me as always. I promise to be a better…well…everything. Later.
Bonus Day!
Still working out the kinks in my camera phone. Not all my “files” are making it through. Maybe it’s a new advanced Samsung feature when you try to send pictures through the system it automatically corrupts the file of the crap shots so you don’t even waste your time.
That company is so smart. The first picture is a flower from my neighbors house. I have more. Of course I do. Today is an unexpected day off, so I like to call them the bonus days, in life. My plans are suddenly open and fluid. Maybe I will catch up on sleep. Maybe I will post all day. Maybe I will take a shower and remove all this excess hair from my legs. Yuck. Maybe I will sit on my ass playing Tiny Village. Now that it is my only game and play app, I can really focus on it.
*Quick side note: what do we, you, the general public, think about spending actual real world dollars on these games? I am seriously considering paying cash for crystals because I want to do stuff in this fake world faster. Leave me a note/comment when you can. Thoughts, ideas? Is this the lamest way to spend money ever? I can justify it by saying it’s an early birthday present to myself. Maybe? I got paid today and I have time to burn. These are my “for” arguments.
*Extra quick side note: I have updates on my health. Too fat. Too little exercise. Apparently I need to be doing the “cardio” kind. B/P still a skosh too elevated. I have been increased on my starter meds. But I’d like to D/C them altogether. The MD said I could if I wasn’t a rolly-polly when I come back to see him next time. Lupus titer high and positive again. (Lupus panel negative though. I may have a life-long, general, vague, comes-and-goes, inflammatory disorder to deal with for my golden years. If a face rash and some bad numbers on a blood test is all I get from this over the years, I will be a very happy camper. I can exercise and stay out of the sun. No problem.) I will be heading out to the garage to pull some of my “diet” books and revamp the current food plan. But first I need to get that shower/shave thing out of the way. And believe me I have plans for more postings about this. I already have a title for my new quest in mind. “144 by 44”. See, I will be 44 this year. And my follow up appt is after my birthday. 144 lbs might not be exactly do-able in that time frame, three months, but I can try. I hesitate to throw out my actual weight number because I am not sure if it’s fat or not. It’s a good amount under 200. It’s definitely not slim. But I am a heavy person in general. Like, heavy bones. I know that sounds like an excuse, but I’m like a deceptive bag of concrete. I might look compact and weigh what the number says on the sack, but when you go to pick me up, I-Yi-Yi!! I weigh a ton. And now your back hurts! 144 would be the least amount I have ever weighed as an adult with children. Except for the brief month, many years ago, when I weighed 138 because of a literal diet, of coffee and breath mints, when I was going through some shit. I literally could not eat food without throwing up. Not my fault. But also not a story for this bonus day either. Spoils the fun.
Maybe I will get new grass today. Literally. The village I live in tore up my yard as you may remember from ONE YEAR AGO. Almost to the day. Because of broken water mains. Click to read. Catch up here. Well they are back. Sort of. They have been coming to the house every day this week doing something to the front. Flatten it out. Dig up more. Shore up the edges. Fill in with dirt. Smooth that out. I have got to believe that sod is next. Maybe today?! I hope they hurry. I hear storms are approaching. Storms with really cool names. Derecho.
The following is copied word for word from a weather news site:
A derecho, Spanish for straight, is a widespread and long-lasting storm that comes with fast-moving thunderstorms and rain, and also can bring damaging high winds, hail as big as golf balls as well as tornadoes. Weather forecasters have been warning that this rare weather phenomenon, which last year left a 700-mile trail of damage across the Midwest and mid-Atlantic, this time could hit a swath of states from Iowa to Maryland starting Wednesday.
Yay! At least I won’t be at work and then have to drive in it this time. I also need to seriously update some of the pages on this site. I noticed some old info floating around and we could use a freshening. Let me finish this quick. I’m running out of shower time before these kids get home. I will try to link the yard thing and post the new pics of the yard. And some flowers and probably birds. And lottery news. Still working on the scratch-offs, but I can tell you, so far, we are not winners. Still have to work for the money. I have 4 cards/chances left. Wouldn’t this be a great site if I could just write every day about how much money I have and how I don’t have to do anything, ever, again in real life if I don’t want to? I would just post title after title with some picture taken from my couch: Still Rich. Suckers! Oh to dream….Later.
That would be The Truck. And The Dig. And The Smooth. Hopefully the next picture will be, “The Grass”. Ugh. My kids have started calling me for rides and I am still hairy. Ugh. Bonus Time Shower Time. Although shower time should really be an All-The-Time. Ugh. Wasting Time. Later.
And Now, The Baby!
I went with “smiling” baby. It’s been a week, but I finally made it over to the new baby house. And I only took a few pictures. I know. I was having an off day I guess. It’s hard to take pictures though, while you are holding the baby, so there is that. I tried though.
And since this is pretty much all the baby does right now, I didn’t stay long either. I told my brother to call me when his boring kid starts doing stuff and I’ll come back over. I think he is still convinced (hoping) that this is how puppies look before they start growing fur and a tail. I’m going to let one of my sisters break the human news to him. But, he sure is cute isn’t he?! Later.
Update! The Meat!
This is the smoked meat result from the post a few days ago. I figured I would do this one first. Have the baby follow the meat. Although the meat following Memorial Day seemed wrong too. I think I solved the problem (Did I?) with a picture of a dandelion puff. This is only some of the meat. Much got eaten, apparently, while “pulling” it apart, and then more got eaten as a meal that night. When I got home at about midnight the same night, that entire dish was full. It was delicious! Perfect texture, great seasoning, flavor galore, and tender tender without being fatty or greasy. I ate enough. The BF made cole slaw too. And that was also delicious. And I am not really a fan of the coleslaw or even know how to make it. We are protein packed here for the week now. In case you were wondering poundage of meat—some do—I think the BF said it was 15 or so. Good thing it worked! Later.
Update 2. What did it mean??
Tomorrow Weed For Women Behind. Click here for the original post and question. Since the story is pretty basic, and straightforward once you hear it, I will just explain without a lot of writing. It was a note left by my daughter to herself. The “woman” that lives “behind” us, asked my daughter if she would “weed” her garden area “tomorrow”, for money, so that she could plant the next week. So my daughter left herself that note so that she wouldn’t forget when she got home from school the next day. However by spelling woman as women, she added that little bit of mystery and confusion to the whole note. Never believe that your words don’t matter. And never believe that punctuation or one wrong letter cannot change an entire thought or meaning to a random message. Spelling matters!! Every letter counts!! Every comma counts!! And I should know, because I use A LOT of both! (And let’s not forget the under appreciated exclamation mark, which I also roll out on a regular basis to make extra points.) The flower was simply there so that she would be sure to notice the note. Makes all kinds of sense right? Now it does. And FYI, she did weed the garden and she did receive some cash. End of story. Mystery solved. Now we can move on to the next silly thing.
Extra FYI, those are the kids being cool and funny above. But since they take, like, a million pictures, all the time, they can’t all be gems. So I put one of those below. I swear my daughter just holds the phone up and presses the button constantly, capturing these exciting moments for me to cherish. It makes me laugh every time I see it. Blah blahbbity blah. Bleahhh…
Updates!
One baby born! This little boy was actually born last week, but as you all know, I am lame. Hopefully any family people saw it on facebook. I mean, you can just go with this site for your local, state, national, news, but you will be getting very specific, and very late updates. Specific to me and my life and the things I feel strongly about, and, more importantly, anything I actually have time to post about. Good thing it’s not my job. Anyway, this is my brother’s new baby. About a week old now with several names. John Thomas James. It’s a nice strong set of names. I just looked up the date and it was May 16th. Now all of my siblings have children in May. (My one sisters kid was actually born June 1, but I’m counting it because it’s close enough and I still have to send the card in May) I guess I know what everyone’s been doing in the fall. Labor Day Fun Times. Ah love. So he is pretty cute huh? And he’s already got that look in his eye that my brother has most of the time. Congrats!
And a special thank you to my brother for telling me the good news in a hilarious and awkward fashion. It made me laugh all the way to work. You know you want to know, and I hope it translates here as funny as it was when he did it. He calls me and of course I figure it has to be about the baby so I just say, “Hello? What’s going on?” And he says (very seriously and literally), “Uh, well, um, well, you know, uh, we, uh, um, the baby, you know, um, well, it’s here. The baby is born and you know, it’s, um, it’s born now…” That may not be word for word, since he was mixing those “ums” and “uhs” and “wells” up all over the place, but it’s pretty damn close. I said, “Geez Tom. Could you tell me any more awkwardly? Just say ‘we had the baby!’ It’s not like, Oh hey, you know that thing that’s been growing in April? Maybe you noticed that she’s been getting kind of fat lately? Well, we went to the hospital because she was complaining about some pain in her stomach, and well, turns out it was a baby! So they, uh, got it out of there and it’s here and we have one now that we get to keep and take home!” Man, I love my little brother!! Hopefully he won’t be mad that I shared in this public place! Love and all that stuff. Later.
And then, THREE MONTHS later…
Yada yada yada. I’m back. Just like that.
Let me explain. No. There is no time. Let me sum up.
Still dealing with the poop and the pain on a daily basis. It has been 5 months now and I believe that I am finally settling in. Relaxing. Using the skills and critical thinking tools I was armed with from the start. They said it would all make sense. They said it would get “better”. And it has. It is. I no longer go into panic mode every day at 2 pm when I am about to walk through the doors of hell and into the fire pit. It’s not hell. It’s my job. And so far it’s good. And from what I have been reading from some of my fellow classmates who have been working in various other locations, my job ain’t all that bad. Plus, I lost 30 pounds! Bone. Ass. (!!) Seriously.
The kids are great. My son graduated, as scheduled, from the 8th grade and is now moving onto high school. We had him a little party two weeks ago that I think was an awesome success. Most of you all were invited. And most of you all came! He had a blast and was super thrilled to see how many people would come over to our tiny little house and pack in and eat every last scrap of food, including the cake (a full sheet). And then stay through the ever hilarious, gods of weather, thunder and lightning show and torrential downpour of rain that we hadn’t had for over two weeks, but picks our party night to decide that the clouds are full enough.
The next day, we wake up to a burst water pipe in the front yard. Flowers and landscape timbers floating all over the front. A giant mound of grassy water bursting through the ground. Like a giant pimple on the day of the big prom. But we had our moment. One day earlier and all would have been lost. I still cried though. I pictured the sidewalk gone, the driveway gone, most of my front grass…it truly looked like water was pouring out from everywhere.
But in the end it was just a few hours with no water and no toilet, some splattered mud, and 100 degrees of fun for the village workers who fixed it asap. Luckily for them we had cases of water chilling in the backyard coolers. Now I just have one, big, muddy spot near the front of my grass where it meets the sidewalk. And two, square, bracer divots where the back hoe sat digging up the nearly perfect lawn that my son had been working on all spring.
Next up, football training camp. For the boy. Not me. It has already started and ended for the first session. Those first few days were not good. Lots of work. Lots of drills. Lots of getting knocked down. The mandatory vomiting due to extreme physical exercise that one is unprepared for. Could never be prepared for. But now I think he likes it. He’s part of the team. And the team is good.
It also helps that he’s the second biggest player on the whole team. Freshman and Varsity. Respect for the linemen. Especially when they get right back up and don’t complain. Plus, they get free lunch! Football player perks! FYI…that, above, is a good illustrative picture and an excellent book for teenage boys. Read it if you want a fast story with humor and drama and sports. Young adult is the way to go lately and I am not the only one that thinks so.
But I digress. Moving on…
The girl is just as cool as ever. An awesome little chick that is fast maturing from girl to teenager to young adult. Transitioning this year from 7th grade to 8th. Last year of Jr. High. Of course she’s in the NJHS, (National Junior Honor Society), and they had a great ceremony at the school to celebrate the smarticles of all these hard working kids.
And did I mention FIRST place, OVERALL, at the Science Fair this year? Yep. First. Place. Over. All. She’s interested in her friends, boys, clothes, hair and makeup, but still found the time to go hang with her aunty and her bestest cuz Elexa for a week, just because she hasn’t been there since spring break, and she missed her!
Good kids I got, for real. As for today, this very minute, they are gone from me again. As they do every year, they have left for Kentucky, with their dad, to visit their grandma and stay for the week over the Fourth of July. They left at 10:30 am and the house is quiet. The way it used to be, before the BF, and after my little ducks would leave the pond for a long trip somewhere else. It’s non-stop, fishing, swimming, and boating, on the lake or in the pool. I don’t expect to hear from them because the days blend when you are on that kind of vacation. Plus they’re 13 and 14. They go where the day takes them. But they have technology now and pictures will be posted. So we can all follow along. Yoodle yoodle yoodle yoodle! Live action!
Oh yeah! I almost forgot! Another tree limb fell in the back yard! You can see it in the picture hanging on the phone line.
And here you can see it denting the metal table we have on the patio. It pretty much fell straight down into the yard from the tree. Luckily we were able to move it ourselves and get it off the AT&T line. The real tragedy would have been losing internet access. And that is no lie or exaggeration. Ipods and XBox really don’t work very well without it. Our whole life revolves around those wireless connections. But we still need the wire outside to connect us. The tree did pull it down pretty low though. AT&T came out and pulled it up tight, just in time for the party. And one of the BF’s friends came and removed all the extra stumps and wood logs we had lying around from the last year. It’s scary empty in the back. And it’s weird not to have the constant reminder that we live with these insidiously malevolent trees that decay from the inside, but attack on the outside. No warning. You can see how sunny and pleasant it looks in the picture. Because it was. You hear a loud boom. A rattling jangle of metal. A heavy thunk. It’s not even windy. Whatever. Pick it up. Move it to the back. Plus, it’s the perfect opportunity for your son to use the chain saw for the first time. Yes. He was super excited. Yes. There are pictures.
And because I just scrolled through all my pics in the last few months…
A random crawfish strolling across our back patio. Big too. Don’t know where he came from. Don’t know where he was going. Haven’t seen another one since. I might have even already mentioned him. If not, there you go.
Mother’s Day.
Found money. Seriously. We found this 100 dollar bill folded up, laying on the ground outside of a store in the parking lot. Most money we have ever found in our silly game. (Street Money. You can click the link to the right or this whole sentence, and read all about it.) For the record, we did go back and try to see if anyone had lost any money. Nope. Ours to keep. I promised it to the kids, to split, if they would remove every single weed from the bricks on the back patio in preparation for Mason’s party. They did. In fact, they removed every single paver and brick individually, weeded all around them and put them all back in place. In about 4 or 5 hours. Money. The great motivator.
The Avengers!
Best red blend and white blend. Ever. And I don’t like white wine. Never drink it. Tried it on a whim because it got reviewed deliciously. Not even going to explain why. Just buy them and try them. Good price too. Less than 15 dollars. You will not be sorry.
As for me, I thought I would finally catch up here. I don’t have time to really do anything any more because my work schedule is shit. 3-11. Not conductive to a social life. You work, you sleep. You go back to work. If you make the effort to get up in the day, you will be tired by the night. But you really won’t. You get that second wind. And because you stay up those few hours after work like you would if you worked in the day, the hours eventually start to run into each other and you spend your day off sleeping until noon. Or later. Then the only thing you can do is play phone games (highest score for me so far!) and watch old re-runs of shows you used to love and try to take back the life you once had.
So, I couldn’t help but wonder, am I going to wrap this up or keep typing like I have nothing else to do?
Truth is I do have something else to do. The BF has booked us a nice hotel room away from our town and made reservations at a restaurant that we have never been to. We have a birthday party, with drinks, to go to after and then, who knows? He is out with his friend test-riding a motorcycle trip right now in preparation for the 4000+ mile motorcycle trip they are going to take at the end of the month. And I promised I would be ready by 3. I am lucky. For the first time since I started this job, I have had two, whole, glorious days off, that I got to spend, every minute, with my kids. And soon I will have these two more, glorious days off to spend with the BF. And I have received the ultimate gift of 4 whole hours, of pure alone time, smack dab in the middle of a long weekend off. The house is clean. The dishes are done. The beds are made. The laundry is washed. And dried. Folded. And put away. My overnight bag is already packed. The flowers are watered and weeded and dead-headed. The grass is cut. The sky is blue. The sun is shining. The birds are singing. (And happy and fat with lots of food available in all the feeders.) My legs are already shaved and my hair is the perfect color. Finally. Let’s just type this last sentence and go hop into the shower.
That’s the motorcycle. Which just pulled up and is my cue to really put this thing to bed so I can go have a nice night out on the town. “Out on the town.” That’s funny sounding right? Kind of old fashioned.
And for those playing along with my TV/Movie reference game, I’d like to thank Seinfeld, The Princess Bride, Call of the Wildman, and Sex and the City. There’s another one in there, I think, that I cannot place. I even called my girl for help but she’s already on vacation time and the connection was lost. It’s kind of funny how in this saturated media world we can never be sure anymore if our words are even our own.
Anyway. Hopefully. This post, after so long without, will bring me back to every day. I have been taking pictures and keeping a list of ideas and things to write about this whole time. And I’m telling ya’, some of it is pretty good. And some of it is a lot of birds. I am still obsessed with getting pictures of all the birds that fly into my backyard. Cardinals, hawks, woodpeckers, mourning doves, red-winged blackbirds, hummingbirds, and this year, we have blue jays! I’ll try to minimize the pictures of the sky though. The kids have already told me no more sky pictures. No one cares. It’s enough. And be funny. Funnier. Only the laughs. So here’s to turning a new leaf while still hanging off of the old tree. Birds. Lots of birds. Sitting.
And in the sky.
I hope you enjoyed today and will continue to follow again through the summer and beyond. I appreciate all my readers for hanging through the flood and the drought. This is me, in my life again. I mean, it’s the same life as before, but with better time management. Have a great day and night wherever you are and whatever you are doing. Stay safe. I will talk to you. Later.
L.
It’s Not Just A Job, It’s An Adventure! And A Nightmare. Sometimes At The Same Time. Yay Me.
I was going to save my whiny, work related, complaining post, until tomorrow when I have a day off, but I thought, why not? I’m already on the computer being super jealous of all the fun things my kids are doing. But so happy at the same time because otherwise their spring break would be spent sitting in this boring house with nothing to do because I have to work every damn day and it’s really been beautiful over here, weather-wise, in the Midwest these last two weeks. The girl is with my sister, and her kids, doing something, outside, every day, the zoo and hiking at Starved Rock, to name two, and my son is on his way to Florida with his dad. He’s helping to move his grandma back to Illinois, but they still get to take a mini vacation at the same time! I will be working. Monday, yesterday, today, then for the weekend. B-L-O-W-S.
I see I haven’t posted since Leap Day. That stinks too. Work is harder than I thought. And I seriously miss school. They really do not prepare you for the stress and intensity and anxiety that actually working this job brings on. I HATE to complain about something I have worked so long and hard for, but almost every day is a new nightmare until I get back into my shift and truly can’t think about anything else until it’s all over for the night. They tell me it gets better. They tell me I will hate it for a long time and dread it until suddenly, I just won’t. Well two months in, apparently, is not enough time yet. They tell me just stick with it. And keep getting experience. I will. In fact I have to go get showered and head out again. At least I have tomorrow off. At this point, I only work for my days off.
One more good thing…because you should always end on a positive note! Those weights in the picture represent the weight I have lost in about six weeks. It’s probably closer to 25 now. It’s the bonus I didn’t expect. Unfortunately it’s a combo of a goofy schedule, non-stop moving the entire time I work, and not eating, either because I don’t have time, or because my stomach hurts from stress or because I can’t get my body regulated yet to this goofy schedule and when I should eat, I just can’t. Hopefully I can keep it off once that “good working feeling” arrives! And if I can throw in some actual “exercise” I could be pretty buff for summer. Like, bikini buff! That would be nice for once!
The buzzer is buzzing. I have to go take a shower. In about 12 hours from now, I will be done and I can relax for a day! I also have to go buy Mega Millions tickets tomorrow. 500 million dollars! That’s definite retirement money. I will try and get some more kid news up tomorrow and all the pictures and fun stuff I have been saving for this site whenever I get the chance. Let’s make our own fortune! Right?!?! Have a great day everyone! Later!
just shy of pretty 