Your Boogers Are In The Chicken
This is the kind of thing I say on a regular basis in my house. We stay up way too late. When we stay up way too late, we get silly. When we get silly, we laugh and make jokes. When we laugh and make jokes, we sometimes say hurtful things to each other. When we say hurtful things to each other, one of us storms out of the room like a little bitch. When one of us storms out of the room like a little bitch, the rest of us just laugh harder. Don’t make the rest of us laugh harder. Stop being a cry baby. Put in a tampon and get back in the game. Wait. No. I think I might be mixing up my metaphors with commercials and football pep talking. At any rate, this whole scenario just played out in the living room about 10 minutes ago. Well, not that scenario. That scenario was based on the above chicken and my sister’s birthday present to my son. Cash and a box of Boogers. Leave it to my sister Noelle to find something gross and hilarious. And we keep all our “back-up” candy in the chicken. (That’s the candy that won’t get eaten right away, but we don’t throw out because you never know when you might need some sugar in any form available. You know, stuff like DumDum’s, Smarties, LifeSavers, Cheap Chocolate Coins, etc.) Like my cousin Linda just said to my daughter today, “We are silly people. It’s in our blood.” Yes. Yes we are. But sometimes it can be a curse. Deep sigh. Insert picture of “Boogers” here:
See? It’s my own fault. I am not a strict mom. I make too many jokes and am never serious enough. My kids like to run off the rails with their witty humor and fast comebacks. Because I let them. And they can. They have the good sense of humor that will be a bonus when they are older but can get them in serious trouble right now. And they like to use my own words against me. Usually I can get everybody back on track without a lot of effort. But this time there were too many wheels in the gravel and the cars were piling up behind the engine. Nobody was listening to the engineer. Me. And the only way to get the control back is to pretty much do a “Hancock” and stop that train dead in its tracks. What this means though, is that I have to get angry and abruptly end any kind of night we are having to get my point across and then send everybody off to bed. Unfortunately, just like in the movie it causes a lot of extra damage. Actually now that I’m thinking about it, it is exactly like that. Everybody starts complaining about the way the train was stopped and its like the train is still moving but now its slowly sliding down the side of a cliff into a ravine with a rapid river at the bottom. (Say that five times fast) It’s no good. Then the train falls into the water and lays there, still complaining, filling up and sputtering for air instead of just getting up, saying it’s sorry and being glad we are all still alive. I might have mixed up my metaphors again, but you get the idea. Focus is obviously not my strong point, at least not here, or when I write stuff down. I have lots of thoughts and slow typing fingers. And I can really lose my own track when I get going so I am not surprised that my kids may act the same way on occasion. Especially when it’s late. And they are tired. My kids have these crazy, smart, dazzling personalities that I am so impressed and fascinated by. I want them to have the big life. But sometimes they have got to just stop when I say stop. And that’s where our weak spot is. We don’t have a good switching system in place. We need a better way to flip the switch and change the direction of the train before it crashes into the abyss. We are working on that. Everyone is still in bed and this night is most definitely over, but we are all thinking about it a little more. And since we never end the night on a bad note, because you just never really do know what might happen, here’s another picture of that Booger box:
Picked out especially for you! Maybe tomorrow I better just post a breast cancer thing. I have a store display, so unmagnificent, to put up here, that you will be sorry you wasted any of your valuable computer time clicking over to my site to even look at. But it’s like a train wreck. You have to look. The picture. Not the site. Well, maybe the site too. Come on! What else are you gonna do?? Click. Scan. Move on. Oh, hey, one last stopping-the-train thing. Spider Man 2 has an excellent train stopping scene in it. I was going to use that as my movie reference but it’s not really a “dead stop” and the people are all grateful in the end. Not applicable to my situation. Plus I don’t feel tired after. I am just glad it’s finally quiet. Anyway it’s a good part in the movie. And finally, here’s one more, completely random, and unrelated to any of the above 900 words, picture, of my children doing something together, and in sync (Comma alert! That last sentence may be a record holder for me. Count em’ and weep.) Here’s that pic:
Love and other drugs…
This is what my kids love. (Well, this and X-Box Live. I think the Microsoft Corporation is seriously brainwashing our kids {and a whole lot of grown-ass men} thru the consoles. At least all the ones that aren’t being brainwashed by Sony Corp. I’m talking to you PS3 people!)
Summer (unofficial) practice starts today. Ya gotta bowl with the new stuff to really bowl!
We do: Kids Bowl Free! Click it to sign up. We use the alley we have leagues in, but there is a variety of bowling centers to choose from. Kids Bowl Free is awesome, and I LOVE our regular bowling center, however, it’s farther away from home and gas ain’t cheap. BUT, I did sign the kids up this year anyway, because it’s still free bowling!
Luckily, we have several bowling corporations in our area so I was able to sign them up for another program too, which I highly recommend:
Summer Unplugged! Free Bowling for Kids! This is for AMF Lanes exclusively.
Click it and sign up. We go EVERY day. No joke. And if you like to bowl, pay the extra and sign yourself up too. It really is a good deal. (Even better if you have your own shoes!) We do two separate programs, but I would recommend the AMF program to start. A few bucks extra, but more summer days, and lots of available bowling time. Also, cheap rates for games if you need to bowl a few more because you are, let’s say, breaking in a new ball, and you need to work on that curve.
Bowling gets you up and out of the house. And it’s pretty good exercise. Do it, even if it’s just so the house feels cooler when you get back! Plus, once you’re out, you may find a whole summer of fun waiting for you on the other side of the couch! Click one, join one, then turn off the computer and GO PLAY!
I gotta say…
I don’t know who the heck is still looking at this every day, but, thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my 15-week-jammed-up-school-crazy-going-no-time-to-post-anything heart! Someone is keeping me alive and on the charts and I thank you.
I literally have one more clinical and one more week of class to go this semester. One care plan. One evaluation sheet w/ goals. One Hesi test. One Lab Final and one final Final. Now that I have typed it…it seems like alot. But trust. It is not. Actually it is but that’s just because I have to study everything, all over again, and then answer even MORE questions. But then I’m done. Until January. One post in 15 weeks…not bad.
Here’s a quick update: School. Football. School. Football. I take the kids to bowling. I go to clinicals. I don’t play any games anymore on facebook, but I do check the site. I stay up way too late. And not for good stuff. I rebooted my Ipod but I am not in love with it anymore. I lost all my playlists and a few hundred songs when I re-loaded the back up discs. I haven’t exercised in weeks. Unless you count the few pushups I do every few days to make sure that I still can. Which I do. But I still fit in my small pants so I don’t care too much about the extra flab hanging over the top for now. I can hit the gym in about a week. School is busy but fun this time. Stressful but in a completely different way from last semester. And my license is calling. I can almost hear it now. I haven’t really been drinking either. Not even enough time for that. Or movies. Or pleasure books. Or mags. I have alot of gossip news to catch up on. My mags are from August…I know I should just throw them away…I’ll decide at Christmas about that. Anyway, I am having a drink now and it is good.
The two things for fun that I have still been doing is collecting change off the street (and keeping it in a cup) and playing my pocket poker game (the quest for the royal flush). Don’t I sound like FUN?? I will post the amount for the last few months in a few days maybe.
AND….wait for it……the quest is over!!
I GOT THE ROYAL FLUSH!!
Oh yeah! No kidding. I think it was clubs. I got it awhile ago but saved the pic for just this moment. I am a wild woman! Do not mess with me and my mad fake poker points skillz! The back of the game says I get 2500 points for the royal flush but I got 5000! What?? I know! It was an exciting day! And just when I did not think it could ever happen again….IT DID!!
TWO Royal Flushes! This was a hearts set. Another 5000. Oh yeah…I’m going for the 10,000. I am unstoppable.
I need to go eat dinner and study something. Thanks for hanging again with me thru the weeks of drought! I really do appreciate your time! I’ll have more later! Pictures are below.
The first one. And that was pretty exciting.
Ugh! Blurry! But you can see it! Another 5000.
That was the high score but I am going for more points. I think I am over 7100 now. Yes I know. Sad life. That’s what the vodka is for. See ya!
Last Thursday Exercise, P.M. Version. Update Post!
We went back! We had to. After running, biking, and scootering the trail, we went and did some “activities”. Some good, some bad, some badder…yikes! Don’t despair. We didn’t take any pictures.
Catch up here if you want, or just keep reading.
After we got home from the first exercise segment, we changed and went bowling! Kids Bowl Free! All summer courtesy of the bowling alley they had leagues at. So there’s the good, until…the snacks! Ugh! Fried appetizers and spinach dip with fried chips and soda! We ate it all. We bowled our games. We drove home feeling yucky and like we wasted a workout. The bad! Back to the trail!
It had rained/stormed while we were on our way to bowling, but now it was humid, sticky and buggy. We managed approximately, generously, to get about a mile of walking in until we headed back to the car and on to the badder!
Oh yeah. Baskin Robbins baby! We have to pass it to get home. So we obliterated the day with some scoops for our poops. And it was good!
But before I leave you with that sad tale of woe, check it out: Going back to the Forest Preserve got me Lucky Number 13 on the Challenger Posts!
Blue and Beautiful and Below:
Trophy Post!
Here they are! One beautiful trophy after another. (I tried to photograph for dramatic effect.)
First up…the elusive Mason Basketball Trophy! The Crown Jewel of our growing collection. First school team, with official uniforms and referees!
After that, Bowling. (There were trophies) Fourth place. Still, it’s a trophy. That was back in April. We were holding out for the basketball so we could do them all together. I don’t know why.
Then, more Basketball Trophies. Four years of Community League. Might as well throw them in. They look good and it makes the site more picturesque. Posted forever in posterity or for at least as long as the power stays on.
There were also some Swimming ribbons and a plaque, but I couldn’t find them in the kids stuff. So far, we have three sports represented and we aren’t even out of middle school yet! Enjoy the pics!
Today is the day!
It’s Friday. It’s beautiful. The sun was shining through my children’s window in such a way that it makes you feel like everything will be ok.
Not to say that anything is bad…it’s just that kind of day. If you can’t take the sap this early, I understand. Check back later for the post about my Wednesday Church experience. No cheese included. That’s kind of weirdly ionic huh? Sun=Peace. Church=No peace.
Back to today:
I found a dime, walking the kids to school (separate post).
I took a shower, fresh shampoo, fresh soap, fresh fragrance…I feel really clean, like, squeaky clean, AND I used a new deodorant that smells like Florida! The good Florida. Beachy, sunny, oceany, sexy southern sultry, steam off the street…man I miss that place…
Anyway, I’m posting a bit, catching up. Update the daily life and what I’m doing. I’ve been busy with actual out-of-the-house stuff. Had to get more school related paperwork, make 10 different appointments for body checks, myself and the kiddies, run to the drug store for cards and snacks and special lunch for my daughter who has 5th grade picnic, take the boyfriends mom to the doc, pick up prescriptions, take the mom back to the doc, talk to my mom, my sis, my niece, my ex, my exes ex….you know, just stuff.
One school year ends, another begins. My son is going into 6th grade! Jr. High! So exciting. He’s visiting the school today to see how it looks, get a feel for lockers, and changing classes, and being a teenager. Then he gets to have Basketball Pizza Party after school. Still no trophies though. He says Tuesday. I haven’t forgotten. I have the post all ready, just need to throw in the pictures. I know every single one of you is dying to see those Bowling and Basketball trophies. Stay tuned!
I have one more doc trip with the BF mom’s today at noonish, then I can hit the trail and wait for my daughter to get home.
I have to run, even though I’m plodding out there like a hippo in the heat. It’s pathetic. It feels pathetic. Every step, I just want to stop. But now I have to go to the doc’s this Monday and I don’t want to weigh too much. If you are still following my, “Lose 20 lbs. by Warrior Dash” extravaganza, here’s the update: I have to lose 2 pounds just to get down to the original weight I wanted to lose 20 from. So I’m working on that, but nature is battling against me. It’s like the perfect storm of weight gain. Natures gift wreaking havoc, bad dinners, late nights, early mornings…It sucks. I have to stop eating and try to live on coffee and breath mints until Monday for my “fake weight” at the doc’s, and then work on the real thing next week. I know, I know, It’s not healthy, it’s not a good example, but who cares. Those medical records follow you around FOREVER! I can’t be overweight every single time! It’s soul crushing! The good thing is that I am actually about 20+ lbs. down from the last time I was there, so it still looks good, but for my personal self and all you people—still too heavy. Plus, I can’t be running around an obstacle course with flabby arms and a weak belly. I want to look all cut and sexy covered in mud and sweat and swamp water. Wouldn’t you?
Now that I’ve really sidetracked…let’s see…the BF is playing Poker with the buds later, so dinner is all me and the kids. So how many people out there think it’s going to be chicken breast and brown rice. Uh huh. More like Taco Bell and Baskin Robbins…see what I’m up against? I guess I’ll just eat and throw up. Not. Please check the following post about that BAD IDEA. I just tell myself, don’t eat THAT much. Am I a F…ing idiot??? Sometimes.
I’m so far behind here. Let me wrap this up. School, Exercise, Posting, Dinner, Weekend Parties, Movies, Popcorn, Ice Cream…that sound about right.
Church post, Flower post, Money post, Mason New Toy Post, Cool Word, Quote, and Music List.
No trophies, no weight loss.
Pictures WILL be included.
Chicago is sunny and 70. It really is a beautiful day.
Check back here later for a laugh or two, but get outside if you can.
Later gators!
just shy of pretty 