Speaking Of Drinking…

April 15, 2013 at 2:46 am (Drunk Posts, For Jeff the BF, Giant Food, Picture Posts, Posts In Pictures) (, , , , , , , )

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You know you need to work out when you are too weak to pick up your big bottle of booze. Real time pic using the coffee maker (12 cup/full size) for reference. Hey. Don’t judge. We didn’t start at the top. We slowly graduated up to the party version. It’s more economical. Picture proof below. Although I really shouldn’t. It’s embarrassing that we even have all these bottles (we don’t; anymore) and that we took a picture. (The BF did it. I’m just posting it because we are immature.) It’s a nice shot though huh? Super sharp and clear. His new phone takes really good pictures. I’m so jelly. Later.

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Yuk! Sorry for that ugly picture of strawberry jelly in a bottle. I blame the booze. And speaking of booze…I sense ANOTHER new feature coming!

September 23, 2011 at 3:19 pm (Cheap Red Wines, Day to Day, New Features) (, , , , , , , , )

The booze to blame is that bottle of wine above, and the martini kicker I had earlier that evening.

I think I may have over done it yesterday because I was feeling tipsy overnight and into the morning. Now in my defense, I think I may have an allergy problem, but since I don’t like to go to the doc or take medicine I will never know for sure. I was thinking a summer-transitioning-into-fall cold, but I tried some Benedryl and timed myself for 30 minutes and lo and behold, my eyes stopped running, throat stopped itching, nose cleared up and I wasn’t sneezing anymore. I use Benedryl with extreme caution because it makes me very tired. Possibly more than most people. So I buy children’s Benedryl, in the liquid form, so I can take as little as possible while still getting the good effects without the sleeping thing. And when I woke up this morning to get the kids up and out, I must have sneezed 100 times, so I took the Benedryl again, and waited. It stopped the allergies, but knocked me right back out. I crawled back to bed after the kids left and slept until 11 am. I hate to waste the morning, but I could not get up! Thank goodness I have nowhere to go! And luckily, thanks to the dog that lives behind us, I didn’t have the chance to sleep too long. It’s a Basset Hound that HOWLS, for real, non-stop, every single moment that it is outdoors. It literally stands in one spot in their yard and bark-howls until someone comes out or lets that damn thing back in.

But I’m up now and in fact I need to get dressed here and do some actual life-stuff. The wine picture is because I had this other idea for a NEW FEATURE, called: CHEAP RED WINES!! So what the heck, let’s just launch it right now!

CHEAP RED WINES!!

The above bottle is from Target. Uh huh. When I write: cheap red wines, I actually mean, cheap red wine. The Targets (usually SuperTargets) that have alcohol sections have a pretty good variety. Lots of hard liquors, beers and wines. I will be focusing on only reds because that’s what I like. I’m not really a fan of white or pink wine. And I like to buy variety wines. Things that are mixed together. So I try whatever looks good. My system is very simple. I look at price, usually under 20 dollars (most are around 10 or lower) and what kind of label they have. Lame I know. But a good label might have a good wine. Advertising is everything. I also like to see what wines they threw together. I guess that can be my third rating point. Sometimes you can guess what it will taste like based on what types are in there.

This particular wine is vin Parfait. From California. I don’t know if it’s a reputable wine company or a Target brand. I know that I did have a coupon for it. Yes. A coupon for wine. Wine in a bottle, not even a box. I picked the wine though, BEFORE I knew I had the coupon. (The coupon had come in a mailer weeks ago and I forgot all about it until I went to pay and saw that I had it!)

This wine was $12.99, but with my $3 dollar coupon, it was $9.99. So 10 bucks or so. and it’s a mix of 5 types. Cabernet, Zinfandel, Syrah, Petite Sirah, and Merlot.

It was smooth and easy to drink. No sharp flavors or a strong alcohol burn. It wasn’t overly dry or overly fruity or without flavor altogether. Some wines have an overwhelming flavor of one kind. They can taste peppery or spicy. I liked it. The BF did not. I ended up drinking most of it.

As you can tell by my descriptions I am a total professional wine connoisseur. I am not claiming any kind of extra knowledge and I am not going to look up terms and adjectives to describe these wines. In fact I will probably limit the next post to the name, price, content and drunk factor. This particular wine is a buzzy wine, not a drunk wine. I’ve had some where you can feel it after one glass. This is not that wine. But I think it would make a good wine to bring to someone’s house. It’s low ground but not gross tasting. And it’s good with food. We enjoyed it with some gourmet Cheeseburger Hamburger Helper. It’s a classy household over here.

Now don’t you feel like you may have learned something new today? If anything, you’ve learned that I am terrible at describing how wine tastes! That’s gotta be good enough for Friday! I’ll get to work on another wine to review right away! Cheerio!

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I blame the booze

December 19, 2010 at 12:19 pm (Big Fish, Day to Day, News, Oscars, Pictures) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

And messed up cosmic bowling. And a million people all driving towards the mall. And a long line at the liquor store. And that first, delicious, vodka martini with garlic stuffed olives (pretty good, not as over powering or breath killing as you might think). And the movie Elf. And the bottle of wine that I bought the other day. And the other bottle of wine that I bought today. And the sore muscles that prevented me from getting up and moving in a timely fashion. And the Wizard of Oz, with commercials, so that I could struggle to my feet and exercise my way to the kitchen for more drinks in between.

But not actually exercise. Or not eat. The moment I said I would just drink and not eat, all I could think about was food. So we ate pretty much all the leftovers in the house. And then some other stuff too. Sorry Mason, we ate the cheese sticks. I’ll buy more this week.

And then it was so late. I could stand and walk enough but I was not doing, like, a workout. And now it’s morning. For the record I slept like crap. And I had a headache all night long. And I was really thirsty. And I had strange, weird dreams about working in a hospital. A giant, multi-level, spread out hospital that doesn’t exist in real life. I had to put eye drops in a long list of patients scattered everywhere, and measure their pupil dilation. But I couldn’t find the rooms. And the patients were listed categorically by disorder and it seemed most were psychiatric. It took me 15 minutes just to get near the hospital rooms. There was a huge, 2 level, narrow, oddly stepped staircase I had to go down (and back up) and my kids were following me and I was wearing my school uniform.  AND I was drinking in my dream too! IN the hospital. All the other nurses and doctors were too.  I don’t know what that means but it’s probably not good. In the end I could only find one person on the list and he refused.

Thank god I woke up. I’m drinking coffee now without anything in it, although I bought something for that yesterday too. I’m going to wait until later. During football, to start drinking again. And I must try to exercise even though just trying to cough hurts at this point. That’s the problem with irregular exercise. Those muscles hate stretching out after you let them sit for awhile. Then they punish you big time by not letting you move faster than sitting and not lifting more than a fork or a glass. Thank goodness I can type, right Amanda??

I suppose I better get up now and do something. In celebration of school being over I got myself some fake nails. But I am not skilled on managing alot of personal hygiene things yet. Takes practice and some different moves. Like, for instance, it took me half an hour to put in my contact lenses. It’s stupid. I don’t know how the fancy girls do it 24/7. But in a week or so, I’ll have naturalized myself to the whole concept and I’ll be fine. I let my daughter get some too, but her’s are probably all broken and chipped by now. 2 days would be a record. She likes to tap them on everything and pull at them all the time. Anyway…my point was that it takes longer to do less.

And I have a crazy fish to deal with. My son’s Oscar has taken to swimming around the tank in circles. Not like around the outer edges, literally swimming in fast circles like he’s a dog chasing his tail. We can’t figure out what the problem is. One site said water issues, one says nutrition, one said maybe he broke the heater and he’s getting electrocuted continuously. Well, there’s another fish in the tank and he seems fine so I doubt it’s that, but we unplugged the heater anyway. Still spinning.   He also likes to attack the surface and throw water out. He just did it again. The other things are not easily fixable so I say just move him out. I think he’s too large for where he’s at and needs to be moved to the big tank. There are a variety of fish in it already and one giant Oscar. He used to be really aggressive, but he seems to be tamer now. I think it might be ok. It’s a pity though, because Mason’s fish is nice and smooth with no scars or damage and he’s probably going to get beat up a little bit if we switch him.

Anyway, these are the problems of a Sunday morning stall. Type long enough and something else will come up to do other than exercise. Like your mom calling you and asking when you planned on coming over. Hi mom! Thanks! Did you read all this? It’s funny huh?? So, since I didn’t make it clear when I called her earlier, and she won’t drive her scroungy butt to me, I guess I better really go get dressed and haul it out there! See? No exercise! Yay fat me!

I am posting a picture of the big Oscar that Mason took as companion to this fine piece of writing, except that its at the top, so you’ve already seen it. And I still have lots of Christmas pics I took from around my house when I was goofing around with the camera. And hopefully, I’ll have really old pics to post from when my dad was alive later too. Pretty exciting stuff. You do want to see those, I promise. In the meantime though, here’s a picture of Mason’s crazy fish:

He’s not as clear as he could be, but you get the idea. He’s about 8 inches long and 5 inches top fin to bottom. In a 36 gallon bow tank and looking mean, but we’ll see.

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Ass Water, Slyder and Freddy. I hate when nights end like this!

June 1, 2009 at 10:52 pm (Day to Day) (, , , , , , , )

How DO some people get their cute little nicknames?

Take two parts alcohol, a late running party, one over-tired kid, and a bag of BK cheeseburgers. Fold in one ingredient after another and try to have an innocent conversation. Then mishear one word and suddenly everyone has a new nickname and the night has taken a seriously wrong turn.

It probably won’t SEEM funny typed out here…and I’m sure my sister will be calling any second to tell me how NOT funny I am, but let’s try!

Sissy and hubby come home from party I babysat for with BF and kids. Girl is sleeping. Boy is ready to go. I say, “Ready Freddy?” He says, “Who’s Freddy?” My sissy says, “You now. We’re going to start calling you Freddy…hahahaha…”

Lots of laughs, extra jokes, T-shirts will be made…the whole thing.

As we are leaving, my boy says, “Bye Aunty Amanda”  My sister hears, “Bye Aunty Enema” “What? What did you say? Did you say enema?” Laughing of course, because it’s funny. And it did sound like that. We all make a joke about enemas…and my son says, “What’s an enema?” We basically fall over each other to tell him, water up the butt.

“You just called Aunty the water you put up your ass”

Yes, here it comes. Are you laughing? “You just called Aunty ‘Ass Water’ ”

That WAS funny. We all laughed, and I said that would be her new nickname. We could put that on a shirt.

The hubby already had the Slyder nickname from a motorcycle mishap early in his riding career. The “Y” just adds that extra level of cool.

The BF pointed out that the three names makes an excellent group together. And here’s where you all came in, hence the headline. Sounds…intriguing, does it not? Are you side-splitting? Pictures might help.

Then my son expanded it out, so he could say it without getting in trouble, to “Aunty Ass (as in donkey) Water” It still got the laughs, but by then the booze was wearing off, and we had an hour to drive. Another family memory noted in our collective books and saved here forever on the internets.

Was it as good for you as it was for us?? Yeah right. I recommend pouring yourself a LARGE shot of Vodka (or whatever liquor floats the boat), and then RE-READ. Is it funny now? No? Repeat above step until it is! Then you can drunk-type me with YOUR new nickname and I PROMISE, I WILL laugh!! Swear.

Get to bed. School and work people. We’ll have fun after that! See you tomorrow. Love you Ass Water…I mean, Amanda. Goodnight!

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