I blame the booze

December 19, 2010 at 12:19 pm (Big Fish, Day to Day, News, Oscars, Pictures) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

And messed up cosmic bowling. And a million people all driving towards the mall. And a long line at the liquor store. And that first, delicious, vodka martini with garlic stuffed olives (pretty good, not as over powering or breath killing as you might think). And the movie Elf. And the bottle of wine that I bought the other day. And the other bottle of wine that I bought today. And the sore muscles that prevented me from getting up and moving in a timely fashion. And the Wizard of Oz, with commercials, so that I could struggle to my feet and exercise my way to the kitchen for more drinks in between.

But not actually exercise. Or not eat. The moment I said I would just drink and not eat, all I could think about was food. So we ate pretty much all the leftovers in the house. And then some other stuff too. Sorry Mason, we ate the cheese sticks. I’ll buy more this week.

And then it was so late. I could stand and walk enough but I was not doing, like, a workout. And now it’s morning. For the record I slept like crap. And I had a headache all night long. And I was really thirsty. And I had strange, weird dreams about working in a hospital. A giant, multi-level, spread out hospital that doesn’t exist in real life. I had to put eye drops in a long list of patients scattered everywhere, and measure their pupil dilation. But I couldn’t find the rooms. And the patients were listed categorically by disorder and it seemed most were psychiatric. It took me 15 minutes just to get near the hospital rooms. There was a huge, 2 level, narrow, oddly stepped staircase I had to go down (and back up) and my kids were following me and I was wearing my school uniform.  AND I was drinking in my dream too! IN the hospital. All the other nurses and doctors were too.  I don’t know what that means but it’s probably not good. In the end I could only find one person on the list and he refused.

Thank god I woke up. I’m drinking coffee now without anything in it, although I bought something for that yesterday too. I’m going to wait until later. During football, to start drinking again. And I must try to exercise even though just trying to cough hurts at this point. That’s the problem with irregular exercise. Those muscles hate stretching out after you let them sit for awhile. Then they punish you big time by not letting you move faster than sitting and not lifting more than a fork or a glass. Thank goodness I can type, right Amanda??

I suppose I better get up now and do something. In celebration of school being over I got myself some fake nails. But I am not skilled on managing alot of personal hygiene things yet. Takes practice and some different moves. Like, for instance, it took me half an hour to put in my contact lenses. It’s stupid. I don’t know how the fancy girls do it 24/7. But in a week or so, I’ll have naturalized myself to the whole concept and I’ll be fine. I let my daughter get some too, but her’s are probably all broken and chipped by now. 2 days would be a record. She likes to tap them on everything and pull at them all the time. Anyway…my point was that it takes longer to do less.

And I have a crazy fish to deal with. My son’s Oscar has taken to swimming around the tank in circles. Not like around the outer edges, literally swimming in fast circles like he’s a dog chasing his tail. We can’t figure out what the problem is. One site said water issues, one says nutrition, one said maybe he broke the heater and he’s getting electrocuted continuously. Well, there’s another fish in the tank and he seems fine so I doubt it’s that, but we unplugged the heater anyway. Still spinning.   He also likes to attack the surface and throw water out. He just did it again. The other things are not easily fixable so I say just move him out. I think he’s too large for where he’s at and needs to be moved to the big tank. There are a variety of fish in it already and one giant Oscar. He used to be really aggressive, but he seems to be tamer now. I think it might be ok. It’s a pity though, because Mason’s fish is nice and smooth with no scars or damage and he’s probably going to get beat up a little bit if we switch him.

Anyway, these are the problems of a Sunday morning stall. Type long enough and something else will come up to do other than exercise. Like your mom calling you and asking when you planned on coming over. Hi mom! Thanks! Did you read all this? It’s funny huh?? So, since I didn’t make it clear when I called her earlier, and she won’t drive her scroungy butt to me, I guess I better really go get dressed and haul it out there! See? No exercise! Yay fat me!

I am posting a picture of the big Oscar that Mason took as companion to this fine piece of writing, except that its at the top, so you’ve already seen it. And I still have lots of Christmas pics I took from around my house when I was goofing around with the camera. And hopefully, I’ll have really old pics to post from when my dad was alive later too. Pretty exciting stuff. You do want to see those, I promise. In the meantime though, here’s a picture of Mason’s crazy fish:

He’s not as clear as he could be, but you get the idea. He’s about 8 inches long and 5 inches top fin to bottom. In a 36 gallon bow tank and looking mean, but we’ll see.

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Happy Birthday Amanda!!

July 17, 2009 at 10:29 am (Day to Day, Flowers, Phone Camera, Pictures, Warrior Dash) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

It is Friday the 17 th! My sister’s official birthday! And I see we are reading this webpage a little more regularly now. Thank you! AND making comments. Thank you again!

So, I never got back here yesterday because normal people stuff takes up more time than I thought, which is probably why I don’t do it on a regular basis. But I payed the bills, bought some groceries, tidied up the house a bit…we even had an overnight guest (the kids friend). Next up is laundry—have to get that dang pile down, posting more exciting things from yesterday when I was out in the world (Dodge Challenger…oooh) and basically waiting for my sissy today to come over!

The plan is for her to come here. We are going to have as nice birthday dinner while we can still eat through our mouths and not the feeding tube they will have to put in along with the full body casts that they put on when you break every bone in your body doing some crazy athletic race-type event because you think it’s cool. Then we’ll leave at 5 in the morning tomorrow and prepare for an all liquid diet for the next month! Kidding, I’m sure. We are highly trained athletes. Used to extreme adventures and bad terrain. WE ARE WARRIORS!!

Here are some true excerpts from the e-mail we got:

Warriors,

Brace yourselves for the wildest 3.75 miles of your life, a battleground full of dangerous and insane obstacles!  Warriors, prepare to battle.

That doesn’t seem to bad, right? Then it’s all blah, blah, details about packet pick-up, parking, etc… And then this:

Danger Warning

Please understand portions of Warrior Dash are truly extreme – your best judgment and respect for every participant is expected and appreciated.

This is no joke:  there really will be fire, swamps, extreme hills, etc.  We urge you to take special caution when entering the forest immediately before Splintering Spools because the hill is extremely steep (too steep to run down) and there’s limestone jutting out of the hill in several areas.

Excuse me, while I go poo in my pants. “Splintering” spools doesn’t sound too bad, you know, splinters in my knees and hands maybe…unless it’s like giant shards of wood sticking out…It’s the “steep hill” and “jutting limestone” that concerns me. I would like to NOT crack my skull open on a piece of extreme rock. Fire, swamps…I guess if I’m wet already I can’t technically catch on fire right??

At any rate, I’m getting a stomach ache thinking about it!

So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY SISTER!! We are going to have SO much fun tomorrow!! I’ll make sure Mom gets us a room at the hospital together!!

Here are some flowers from my front wildflower landscape thing I tried to create! Aren’t they pretty? Won’t they be soothing to look at through giant, swollen, teary, puffy, black and blue eyes?? Ha.

For all you other folks who can only imagine…check out the web here for the actual event,

And here for the Face Book Link.

I don’t have it but some of the comments are funny.

Here’s your pictures Amanda! Happy B-day! Love, Me!

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WTF?!?!? My kids are not far enough away from childhood yet.

July 13, 2009 at 10:24 am (Things The Kids Like, Video) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

Monday’s are bad enough. Especially when you stay up too late “studying” (4am) I did give it my best shot, but the kids…the kids…!!

That was my last full night with them until they are off again on more summer adventure! They will be going to their friends house this afternoon and returning on Wednesday. Then, Thursday, they have a friend coming to our house. Friday is my sissy’s birthday!! How old? Not as old as me. Bummer. She and the hubby and the kids will be staying here with us because Saturday, at 7:30 AM is…THE WARRIOR DASH!! Finally! I am planning on having fun, not trying to win or be all super-bad, extreme, athlete…but I am getting a nervous stomach-ache already thinking about this. They sent an e-mail telling us to prepare and don’t be fooled–it really is extreme and dangerous and if you are not careful you will get hurt. That helps. And she says we never do anything for HER birthday! Ha. How about a nice hospital stay?? We can share a room! Kidding.

So the week is kind of booked. I still have my final tomorrow–more nerves–and I tried to read more–but it’s hard when you want to do other fun stuff, staying up with the kids, watching tv, playing on the computer, doing laundry, taking posters and stuff off the wall so we can paint, you know, typical Sunday night stuff. The little quitters crashed out at 1 am, but I go all the way. I crawled into bed just as the BF’s alarm was going off at 4:30. He says, “Are you just coming to bed now?!?” I should have just stayed up. AND, I wasn’t even drinking!

Although after seeing, mostly HEARING this mess below  for the WHOLE WEEKEND, I should have. Sometimes the kids computer search abilities are not appreciated. It’s great that they are getting older and more interested and able to do more things with more resources…and sometimes it’s not.

I don’t know where this came from, I don’t know what it is, why it’s out there right now, and how they found it…but please, make it stop.

It’s obviously geared for the small frys, but 11 and 12 year-olds are not immune. Get ready to have this playing in your head for the next 50 days. I’d apologize, but no one feels sorry for me. The lyrics are included, because you know you are going to want to sing along. Enjoy.

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