This is for Tom
Only Jack.
My brother is a big fan of Jack Nicholson. At least he used to be, and I haven’t heard otherwise…so this post is just for him.
I’m not a great lover of “The Jack”, but you got to give it to him here. Only Jack Nicholson could be floating around in the ocean, getting ready to snorkel, but take a time out to smoke a cigarette. In the ocean. In the water. Not, before he gets in the water, but actually IN the water.
The picture is from D-Listed. Link there (for the actual post by Michael K–adult content) with alot more pictures of Jack-in-the-ocean and on a boat and on land, I think, or to the right in my blogroll, for the general site. (Come on Tom, you know you want to—tips for the future Uncle Tom, that the kids like to visit because he’s bat-shit crazy and a whole lot of fun?!?!?)
Just to be clear about what I am saying (with no sarcasm): Jack is so cool he smokes AND swims AT THE SAME TIME!! Now, who could ever be slicker than that??
Tom, your idol was chosen wisely. Love, Sistah #1.
Ugh! I did it again! And now I’m going to suck you in too…
More pictures of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie taking their kids to McDonald’s. Again! Can you believe it?? They are just like us regular people. They probably have someone who cooks for them, but they’re driving home, the kids are whining about being hungry, and everyone pretty much loves McDonald’s. So fast. So convenient. So tasty. Relatively cheap. It’s America, you know??
And once again, I looked at all the pictures. You can barely see in, the kids are kind of shadowy in the back. Pathetic. I just love to waste time when I can. This was on a different site though. PopSugar. Click the link and you can go there too!
I only took one picture from the site. I think you can get the idea without me having to post everything. I didn’t see a credit for the pics anywhere, but visit the site in case you want to know!
Last post of the night…
Hold on, let me get a drink for this….
Ok. If you read this in any kind of dailyway, I pretty much list off my activities for the day. So, even though I had good intentions when I woke up this morning (early , so that I could watch the WGN Morning News—I even texted what kind of underwear Pat Tomasulo should wear to co-host his first Regis & Kelly Show on Tuesday—sad), basically I did nothing. The road to Hell…
Drank coffee. Bitched and moaned when I had to take the car to the brake shop, which we desperately needed. Grumped about having to go buy windows and stain and rocks for the house to make it look nicer. Hated the lunch I ate, even though I picked the place. Was bored at the Pet Store getting feeders for the cannibal Oscars (which are getting big–I’m going to do a before and after post when I sober up in the morning because I’ll never find the old pictures in this condition). Sat inside and played BeJeweled on the computer and Facebook while the BF cleaned off the roof, gutters and patio in the blazing midday sun. Perked up a little when we had to go get the car, brand new brakes—so nice!–only because I knew we had to go right past a liquor store! Yay! Happily walked around said liquor store picking up various drink items for tonight and tomorrow. Drove car home thinking about making delicious martini’s and laying across the couch like a lump. Sitting here, right now, drinking second martini and typing about the things that I won’t be finishing up tonight. Like…
The laundry.
The kids room. So close too! Got it painted and ready to re-build. Got proof too! See pics below! I was going to save them for the big before and after unveiling, but who am I kidding?? I might not even finish that room now until Sunday or Monday. HA. All I have to do is hang curtains and move the furniture back. Oh Cursed Vodka!!
Another thing I didn’t do was run. And I feel bad about that. It’s been 2 days; three when I wake up tomorrow. (I did paint for those two days—today was just pure lazy) It’s going to suck running around out there for 4 miles, maybe more, as punishment, with a hangover and reeking of booze sweat but I can’t get behind. I have a five mile race in one month and you saw those butt pictures. Eee-yew…did any one else just feel a chill?? Goosebumps. Or giant lumps (of fat in my pants—yuck). I’m not even telling you where those pictures are or linking it. Find it yourself.
What I am going to do though, is finish this up, post those pictures (the walls and windows really did turn out nice–good work SoberLisa!) and make some moves on my BF. (Too much information???)
Like Chrissie Hynde of The Pretenders, once said (and she totally rocks):
“One drink makes me want to go to bed.
Two drinks makes me want to go to YOUR bed.”
Goodnight, Chicagago!
How are you celebrating Mark Buehrle Day in Illinois? Amanda?? I’m talking to YOU!
I got my ABC News picture right there, above these words. I just finished painting on my Buehrle-56-Total-Body-Art-For-One tattoo kit. I’m currently making myself a Mark Buehrle FastBall (9 shots of vodka lined up on my coffee table in front of the TV) with a chaser (5 more shots that you drink during the actual game). Then I’ll probably finish painting the kids room or throw up and pass out.
I’m just kidding. I’m not going to paint. But I do know what Amanda is doing thanks to her kiss ass phone call to my mother while my mother was still at my house.
Appreciation. Have fun sissy! I’ll need pics for future posts! Love, L.C-Bip
Chicago Support! And something funny after all the sadness! (By season, because I may have overdone it and I need some kind of purpose other than my lack of self control)(I also may have taken some liberties with the whole “season” thing too…)
Summer Time, summer time, sum sum summer time…
I have to say I am hitting that “celebrity” Tag a lot lately…but it’s getting into August…dog days of summer…my life is kind of boring…seriously, this is my day: Run and finish painting the kids room. I’ll post pics later of my progress. (Don’t roll your eyes)
Winter Time. There’s no song for that.
Since I am feeling out of touch with the world, I started getting up early again to watch the news which then segways into Regis & Kelly. Channel 9. WGN News/Station, Chicago, Illinois. I love the morning team. I think they are all pretty funny. I suppose I should shout out: Robin Baumgarten, Larry Potash, Ana Belaval, Dean Richards, Valerie Warner, Paul Konrad.
Forward Time. No, it’s not a season….YET.
But I especially love Pat Tomasulo! The Sports Guy. So funny! And apparently America thinks so too, or at least Chicago America because they voted him to be a co-host for Regis & Kelly when Regis is on vacation or days off or whatever! I didn’t even know there was a contest!! Local news people all over the country, men and women, (for when Kelly is gone). Anyhow, I have been laughing at him way back when I still had a job! This was my:
First Time. (with Pat)
So, in honor of him winning I turned to good old You Tube and posted just a few videos, so you could laugh too! As you may have guessed. Don’t give up right at the end here! This is one of the best! Come on! 3 more minutes of your life is all I’m asking!
Good Time.
One more celebrity bit from the internet and I’m done
Why am I looking at 30 pictures of this vehicle?? All pretty much the same. In various stages of food-order/pick-up. Sitting in a McDonald’s Drive Thru?? Oh yeah, because these are pictures of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie taking their kids to McDonald’s using the drive thru! Just like a billion other people in the world. I feel sad for myself that I wasted 10 minutes looking at every one. Celebrities are just so interesting, even when their not. Nice vehicle though.
The site I got these from is:
Socialite Life if you want to see more celebrity stuff.
Picture credits go to: Flynet
Stealing…Borrowing…Copying…Pasting…D-Listed says it’s for real and I trust his research.
Copied the You Tube Video off You Tube.
Copied/Pasted D-Listed Content because it’s way funnier than anything I would have come up with. Credit: Michael K. Check out the site (Adult Content)
His words:
Got an ass so stanky that it makes flies commit mass suicide (don’t look at me)? Got a pair of feet so rank that all your socks disappear from your drawer in the middle of the night? Got a coochie so rancid that the Department of Sanitation declared it a toxic waste zone (Paris, this one goes out to you)?
If you answered yes to one of those questions and are allergic to water and soap, this product is for you! It’s called the Aspray and it’s like Fabreeze for your bits! Apparently, this is a real-life product created by someone named Doc Bottoms (which is also one of Tommy Girl’s pet names).
My words:
I’ll just leave it at that and let the commercial speak for me… I’m thinking Christmas presents for the whole family!?!?!
The birthday that NEVER ends…
Ok sissy, first off, THANK YOU! for reading my posts. Without all this good family material what would I really have to talk about??
So, here it is from me, C-Bip, (that’s my new internet handle–get used to it–stands for Chicago-Based Internet Personality…???…from the previous post???…does anybody READ this thing???) (haha. i’m just kidding. not.)
Even though her birthday was 11 days ago now, we still have to talk about it! The Sox!, blah blah blah, Baseball!, blabbity blabbity, Pictures!, blab blab blab, With players!, me me me…enough already! Here’s your stinking post! With pics!
My only regret is that she only sent three fabulous pictures out of 200 for me to share with my new world-wide celebrity fan base!
So, one more time, HAPPY B-DAY SISTER!! Here’s you, hubby, AJP (can’t spell the last name, too lazy to look it up) and the Sox! Love, L. C-Bip to my peeps.
Hey, I just noticed AJP's last name is spelled perfectly on that guys shirt in the first pic above! So, there ya go!
Full Disclosure:This is blatantly copied and pasted from D-Listed. There is a link to the right if you want to check it out. Adult content.
Michael K./D-Listed. His words:
Open Post: Hosted By Brendan Fraser And His Five-Month Old Fetus
Does Brendan Fraser have something tell us?! Or maybe he doesn’t even know himself and we’ll soon see his ass on an episode of “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant” after he pops out a baby in the toilet of a public bathroom? Or maybe he’s starring as the pregnant dude in a Lifetime biopic? Or maybe he sort-of, kind-of swallowed a beer keg during a drunken night? Eh, it happens.
End of copied work.
So this is me now. I totally copied and pasted the part I wanted to keep. That would be the above. The rest that Michael K. wrote and the actual site are a little too adult for my children who might see it on the front page. But please click on the link to the right and get ready to laugh. It’s my go-to web place for guaranteed humor. (Please don’t be mad. I gave full credit!)
Anyway, the reason THIS is so funny to me, is one, tipsy on the beer fuzz, and two, Brendan Fraser with a beer gut? It can’t be. We just watched Journey to the Center of the Earth a mere 36 hours ago. Seriously. My daughter loves him. She asked if he was married. I said he was. She said, “Awww..” She’s ten. These crushes happen. We watch at least one movie of his every few weeks. No kidding. We are waiting for Inkheart from Netflix right now.
The third reason this is so funny is that I have just recently noticed this disturbing trend in our white male population of the 40-year old range. It seems like every time I see an older, somewhat attractive white guy walking around, he’s carrying that lump along with him. What the heck??
Maybe it’s just me? Maybe America is producing some new super-junk-food-sensation sweeping the nation that our white middle-aged boys can’t resist? And that women and other races know nothing about? I don’t mean to sound prejudice, I’m sure every nationality has a male gut problem…no offense intended…but it’s seeping over into our action stars!! Our sexy, muscle-y, looking-like-they-are-working-out action stars! Oh, the humanity.
At any rate, we still love Brendan, and this gives me a new idea. I’m going to keep an extra sharp eye out now and take a sneaky picture of anyone I see carting this belly thing around with them. It’s very specific in shape and seems to ride high up on the waist. It’s weird. And it looks unnatural.
But, it gives me something to do.
just shy of pretty 