Happy New Year To Me!
44 years old today. My final birthday in which I will actually be getting older. I like the number 44 so that’s what I will be staying at. This is a super fast post before I go to work in half an hour. It’s my holiday to work. Boo. At least it’s double time. Let’s all hope for a fast shift and a fun day if you aren’t working! Have a drink for me. Please! These are my presents so far. Lighthouse bird feeder from the BF. LOVE IT!! Just imagine all those bird shots I will be getting now. Amanda, I am talking to you. Boring, my ass!
From my mom. These are fall decorations for my house. And I got cash. The pumpkins are in the living room now, but they will be relocated to the bathroom as soon as I get new towels and crap. Thank you mommy!!
From my sissy Noelle. Lottery tickets and a magnet. That magnet is already on my fridge. I hope I win money! Thank you! Ok Amanda and Tom, I am waiting…
I also received many internet birthday wishes and coupons from places I shop at and places I don’t. I plan on listing them all later, because some of them are pretty funny. I hope they age adjust the coupons to places I will need as I get older. That would be awesome. Although I am NOT looking forward to my first birthday wish from the “Depends” company. I really really “gotta go” hahahahahaha. Have a great day! With any luck I can spend the last 30 minutes of my birthday back at home tonight! XO to all! Lisa.
Happy March 32nd!
Just kidding. There is no snow. What a jokester I am. I actually took current, up-to-date, real-time pictures of the backyard and that table, to show you what the outside really looks like right at this moment. 5 pm Central time. Midwest America. It’s not warm today. (We only get the stuttering sixties at this point in the year.) It’s back in the 40’s again and it feels cold. But it’s sunny. Warning! The pictures below are uncut and unedited (for time) and are not very pretty. The yard is a sticks and stumps mess like a graveyard for bark parts or the lost world of tree limbs and branches. And all that sunshine blazing down is just lighting up the debris like a Christmas tree. Look here! Crap attack! You will NEVER be free of the Park Forest Tree! That may be a little dramatic, but you really have to live here to know why that is so scary. And true. Read back a bit on this site or just click over on the right there to “Tree Trouble” and you can see what I am talking about. I dare say I may have had an above average amount of bad luck in the breaking/cracking/ falling down department of tree instant removal and upheaval. They like to fall in my backyard. And they like to fall slowly. One piece at a time. Every few months or so. We started out with 3 very large 50 year old trees with many many branches limbs sticks and leaves. Now we have 2 tall “trunks”, at best, that still give me a run for the money when the wind blows too hard. They barely have proper branches on them anymore. Maybe a few limbs, that are very high up and thin, but that still sway on a windy day like drunk gymnasts trying to land on the roof of the house if they could only get the right arc. It’s ridiculous and my own private natural ghost story. The Tale of The Malevolent Maple Tree! The Evil Box Elder! The Horror of the Hackberry! The Horror of the Hackberry is right. That’s the tree ID that is presently lounging around all over the backyard in various shapes and sizes, providing a fine winter home for all kinds of bunnies and squirrels and skunks and probably opossums and racoons. I think those last two actually live up in the tree, but I can’t be sure and I do not have time to check. I see I have gone on and on like I always do and this was supposed to be quick and fast and funny. April Fool joke and all that.
Anyway my original point was to mention that I had been looking back at some of my earlier postings (4 years in March!) and I was pretty funny if I do say so myself. Go ahead and read some vintage posts if you have some time. You will not be disappointed. I also noticed that I had written about the BF’s birthday at that time and even posted about wrapping his present in the Jewel Foods sales paper. Which is what I did again this year! I thought I was so clever. Turns out I am clever. And I have been for at least 4 years, maybe more! Ha. I took a new present pic:
It’s like a birthday/posting/cheap present wrapping flashback. Now, the BF is on his way and we are going to dinner and celebrating the big 4-0 one day early. Presents and cake when we get back. Yes. I made a cake. He doesn’t even know! It’s his fav I think, at least of the cakes that I make. It’s the “Better Than Sex” cake that I also mentioned many years ago. That cake was only presented in a written description posting. This year I have pictures of the process and the results. That cake weighed 10 pounds I think. I will weigh this one before we cut it and let you know. Ok. Better go.
Thank you to all my new friends and followers! I appreciate the time it takes to find or stumble on something new, give it a few minutes to sink in and then actually do the work to “like” and “follow”. I mostly “like” back and “follow” when I get here. Which as you have seen from these last 2 days is like, once every 2 months. So sad. And I like hearing my own voice and seeing my own words. I think that is also pretty obvious if you have spent even one minute of time reading just one of my posts. They get “wordy”.
Ok. Really now. Here’s the real-time pics of today. Enjoy the evening and I’ll be back. I see some long spring days ahead of me, typing deep into the dark warm nights. Later.
Because Christmas will be starting promptly at…..NOW!
NEVER underestimate the power of the TOY catalog for Christmas! Even if your kids are teenagers now. Even if they are 6 feet tall. Even if they begrudgingly dress up for Halloween and complain that trick-or-treating is lame, but still go out there and then eat so much candy that they are sick the next morning. Even if they barely let you take a picture of them in said costumes. These children are powerless against the allure of the magical and colorful, red-ringed, fake wreath of holiday, dunt, dunt, dunnnn, TOYS!! No child can resist. Mine could care less about anything other than video or audio products, but they still like to look. They get all excited and starry-eyed. It’s sick. And truthfully, I think parents like to look too. What else would you have to talk about with the other desperate parents just before you shoot yourself in the head after the second hour of potentially paralyzing, soul killing fun at the Monkey Joe’s or Extreme Trampoline?? Yeah yeah….I signed the waiver…it’s my own damn fault.
The only negative comment I have on the greed of Christmas commerce being shoved down our throats two months early, and the fake anxious panic Target is trying to instill in parents everywhere by deadlining all these “great deals” by November 23, (not even Thanksgiving yet!), when they damn well know everybody who missed these first great deals will be flocking to their stores the Friday after for even better deals, is that their catalog is UGLY!! U-G-L-Y! You make your momma cry! You’re ugly!! Seriously. My picture is pretty true to life. And I tried to get it against a nice, dark background to make it look better. It’s not even a true white cover to give the red something to really “pop” against. It’s this sick, creamy, off-white, dingy pearl color. And speaking of the red, it’s too red. Like, dark red. It makes the green look like lime and not Christmas tree. I am NOT a fan of red and green together. Especially Christmas red and green. But if you’re going to print and mail the first toy catalog of the season you should make the cover bright and cheerful, and not some half assed attempt that looks like it got thrown together on somebody’s lunch break the day before Halloween. Not to mention the failure to use toys from this year. Buzz, Lightning McQueen, Elmo, Barbie, Rubik’s Cube, Etch-a-Sketch, Yahtzee?!?–thank goodness Hollywood cooperates every year with Christmas sales and releases another installment of the same movie so companies can use the same toys with new packaging.
That seemed kind of rough and harsh. I like Christmas actually. It always feel like something good is about to happen. But I kind of like my Christmas to wait until after Thanksgiving before it shows up and carol’s me to death. It doesn’t feel very special when it’s been going on for weeks and weeks and weeks. I also like Target. They do have good deals and they have had much better catalogs. It’s all about eye appeal. Luckily kids don’t care. The clever market research team probably told them not to bother with a fancy look because this is the catalog the kids are just going to flip and tear. Mine did.
All this rainy day, gloomy evening, dark-at-4:30 ranting post (Weather update! That’s for my newest official reader/cousin Linda. Shout out!) has made me thirsty! And since it is dark now, it must be nighttime, and that earlier talk of lime reminded me that I have Corona in the fridge. (That is some “chain of reference” for my other cuz Lorraine. Holler!) And just for the hell of it…Go Sox! (For my sissy, not forgotten, you were the first after all, and next year of course, ’cause baseball season is over. Woop! woop!) Later.
Quick extra note, without comment: The front cover does not say “Christmas” or reference “Santa” specifically. It does on the inside though. Holiday is all you get for now.
Let’s start past to present…like a “birthday” present…haha
When last I left you…we were at the circus. We weren’t actually at the circus, but we saw the tent and we took the pictures (POST BELOW) and we were on our way to dinner. But it still wasn’t my official birthday yet.
Well, that day has come and gone. I moved into a new age bracket, some insurance rates went up, some went down. The various commercial organizations that I get e-mails from, sent me lovely birthday wishes, as if they know me. I have special rates to Vegas, money off if I purchase some shoes, I even get free dessert from Friday’s! Oh yeah, I am living the life.
I only bring it up now because I actually took a picture of all the cards I received and the presents I got. It was a landmark year. One with a zero. I am saving all my acknowledgments, so if I get depressed in the near future or discouraged, I can look at them and remember a good time.
After this we can move on.
Thank you thank you thank you to all who helped me celebrate! I appreciate everything! XOXO

These are my cards

These are my presents. You really can't go wrong with candy, coffee, music and money.
Sunday Morning
After re-reading that questionable Friday/Saturday ranting post, I feel as if I may have been drunk and crazy while typing.
It’s weird because it doesn’t make alot of sense, and it looks all scattery. I wasn’t even a little intoxicated. In fact, I didn’t drink anything alcoholic all day. Just coffee and water.
Let’s just say that I was, and never go back.
The party for my nephew was rocking. Not at all lame or boring. (Here’s to you J and A!) The presents were a hit of course, and the food was good. My sissy had cupcakes and mini-eclairs as birthday cake. ALWAYS an excellent choice. You can never go wrong with desserts you can put into your mouth whole. We stayed too late, and then stayed up a little later after we got home. Had to do something to work that pastry out of the system…
The only thing I didn’t get to do was play my music. Boo Hoo. I really don’t mind, I can always use it at my nieces graduation party we will be hosting in 2 weeks (8th grade–so it’s perfectly aged)
I will post it later for the masses. It’s really a good combo, and this is the season for it. I’ll even throw in the Mud Bug Boil play list, another one for the same family that I slaved on and never got played, but it’s good for the older mixed crowd. I had yesterday’s list named Birthday Party, but I guess I’ll just trim it up to Party or Popular Party or something that indicates a “younger” type party, but not baby, or kegger…don’t you love when I type the exact thing I’m thinking? I know Amanda does. That’s what makes this so interesting and exciting that people would want to read it over and over, and then post a comment about how very cool and interesting it is, because I’m just SO exciting and NOT stupid. Ha.
Take a look at the picture below. It is a helicopter that you control on an arm and try to pick up a cargo box with. My brother, the engineer, got it for my 4-year old nephew as his birthday present. Two hours later and one battery change in, he (my brother) finally figured out how to make it pick up the box. The pick-up hook attached to the underbelly of the helicopter actually EXTENDS. One more time around, and…hooked! Up it went. I took photo proof so all those years of schooling wouldn’t be a complete waste…Next time, Tom, just buy the kid a talking firetruck.
Here’s to you my brother: