This Is Not The Way.
Sorry Doc. I guess I will have to start that diet next week. I haven’t had those delicious breakfast burritos in soooo long. With that spicy good Hot Picante sauce that the McDonald’s Corporation is being super stingy about handing out with their breakfast foods. Signs everywhere restricting the “sauces per order per item”. It’s so stupid. And even when you ask for more packets, AND are willing to pay for the extra sauces, they act like it’s a huge inconvenience, or that you are committing a crime against the purity of their food preparation. Where are these sauce packets that it takes so long, and three different people, to get? Are they stashed away in a secured vault with a time lock or some kind of multiple employee fingerprint/eyeball unlocking mechanism? Seriously they aren’t that good. This is the truth: Sometimes, even when I really really want McDonald’s, or the kids do, I’ll just skip it because I know what a pain in the ass it will be to get what I actually want. Plus the two stores closest to my house are terrible with service, speed, and getting the orders right. Even with the nuggets, the sauce is wrong or missing altogether, more times than not. Doesn’t McDonald’s have enough money without over doing the sauce thing? Its a sauce conspiracy! But I don’t want to have a whole post complaining. I mean, I did get it today. Spent my money. And ate all of it. And tonight the Charmin Corporation will be thanking me for using lots of their fine product. Gross Point Ending. Play on words. Later.
Now Where Was I? Weekly Photo Challenge: Curves. And The Sprinklers.
Because I just realized that all these pics are curved in some way. But I don’t want to start posting just based on themes. The sprinkler “system” above and just a curvy hose below. I was going to put this up next anyway, but I got distracted with the bigger blog world. The same way I have been distracted already with the blue jay, the little baby rabbit, and the momma rabbit in our yard, the sprinklers, the sod and the tree fauna we have growing out of our gutters. Of course I have pictures. I took 20 pictures of the baby rabbit just sitting on a log. Same position. Same zoom. I can’t stop myself. Anyway. I need to eat. So I am taking a quick break. We went and got the new sprinkler so I think the grass might have a fighting chance now. Plus it’s trying to rain out there. I was wrong. Any plans you made, based on my weather predictions are probably gonna get rained out. And the sod is still viable. Double fail on seeing the future. My daughters grad party is today too, so, like you, I will also be taking shelter in a garage somewhere. But I will be telling my daughter, “Everything will be fine. Rain is good luck! It’s still a great party!” Later.
Weekly Photo Challenge: Curves
This is my big “curve” shot. Following up on an idea from another site that is pretty cool, right here (thanks for the info and the comment reply!): CLICK THIS!
I always love a theme. I will waste tons and tons of time taking pictures of almost anything as you can see from this site. Anyway, I already had this picture taken from last Wednesday. My son is a permit driver now, so he drives the car and I can sit in the passenger seat and take as many pictures as I want of anything in front of us. I thought this looked cool. The kids thought I was crazy. “Orange cones mom? Really?” Yes really. I even posted it on Instagram. It got zero likes. But I don’t care. I take pictures for myself, mostly, and this site, and posterity, in the bigger scheme of things I guess. And at least one other person in this fabulous internet world ALSO thought it was a good idea! Respect.
UPDATE: I am learning so much lately about this whole blogging world. I see there is so much to participate in and be a part of. Here’s hoping I can follow simple instructions. I am re-titling this post and tagging it proper for this weekly challenge thing. This pic does not compare to the one on the main site, in fact, mine looks kind of cheesy now, but I’m doing it anyway! Thank you WordPress!
Sprinkler Break.
It’s a cheat. I will get to the underwater thing. Too much build up though, is definitely gonna backfire on me here. But. In between posting I have to water the sod. We have grass again. Remember from yesterday? They were laying it? Well, the BF spent A LOT of time setting up this complicated sprinkler/placement/timing system thing. And I must comply with the program. It’s actually not that bad once you get the hang of it, but we will be heading out to the store asap when he gets home because I am not liking the one sprinkler with its “throwing water in an arc” coverage, compared to the “cascading back and forth” sprinkler you see here. We must have even water distribution! I guess you really can’t tell how the water is moving just from this picture and I did not take a picture of the other, less desirable sprinkler, for comparison. You will have to take my word and/or use your imagination and personal, real-world experience in lawn care to figure out what I am talking about and if I am over-thinking this whole thing in general. As I am oft to do. (That was a fancy phrase, no?) Yea though I wasteth much time, I do say, get thee to the end of thine post fair lady. Fore thy day is a furtive foe that shall not wait for mere mortals to complete thine tasks at hand as night always must creep along, cloaked in thy mist of a fading fire, whispering, murmuring, on thy curls of dusk and dagger, and follow thy setting sun ere into a western slumber.
That makes no sense. I am really flexing and bending the rules of language and grammer right now as if I have nothing but time to waste. The BF is home. The watering is complete for the moment. Below is a picture of the grass as it was layed before the watering commenced, all shimmery and full of promise. Of course, now that we have the grass, and could use all that free storm water, it hasn’t rained one drop. Not even a cloud in the sky. This is the weekend to plan outdoor activities if you want. I’ve insured good weather until the grass turns brown, dries up, and dies. I will let you know when the good days will be over. Later.
Stevie #8. But I’m Going To Stop Numbering These Now To Save Brain Power.
Four Leaf Clover! Looking a bit mangled up here because she had already been carrying it around for awhile after she picked it. Then we had to photograph it. Then she made her wish and let it go into the wind. Or at least into the backyard grass somewhere. I don’t know what the wish was because, you know, you can’t tell anyone or it won’t come true. I told her to be smart though. (Yes, I gave practical, helpful, “wishing” advice.) Don’t wish for something stupid like a billion dollars, because that would never come true. Don’t be greedy. Wish for good health or happiness or something like that. You make your own luck. But it can’t hurt to enlist the help of a random weed in the garden every now and then. Later.
Stevie #7 Mosquito Attack!
The white flower with purple veins. I asked her to go take another picture but with my phone and she said NO.
MOM! You don’t even know how long it took to get that picture! Like, 20 shots and then she was getting attacked by bugs and mosquitoes the whole time. BUT she persevered. And now you may enjoy the fruits of all her hard labor. This was also right before the big storm. And it was a big storm actually. We didn’t lose power (although it did its best to flicker and threaten) and we did not flood (although that water was rising and pooling dangerously close to the top of our foundation), but it was windy and the sky was green and the rain poured down from every direction. We also had hail chips at one point. Not balls. These were shaped like small potato chips. Stevie said they looked like small icy flowers. Because of course she kept running outside to make sure it was still “really” raining. She’s a free spirit. Dancing in the rain. She called it “temperature control”. I don’t know.
Anyway, I have some various pictures to put up later, but it’s a work day. Awww. Major sad face. So I have to shower blah blah and go. On a plus note, the village people (haha) are here laying the sod. It’s actually just one guy. And according to Stevie, he’s cute! So far it looks good. Nice and dark green without weeds in it. Apparently it has to be watered. A lot. I know the BF will be all over that this weekend, so that’s one less thing I have to. Also, more are storms a’ comin’ I hear. Free water!! I hope work is fast and quiet as I always do. I am off tomorrow and the weekend so I can really get some pictures and words up here. I mean, if you have to stay inside anyway, spend the time with me. You can’t go out or you’ll get electrocuted! We had real reports of lightening strikes and tornadoes last night so it’s best if you just curl up with the internet and call it an evening.
FYI follow up note: The sod guy was cute. Too bad I am in the invisible stage of my attractiveness/attention portion of life. Too old for the young hotties and too young for the old settlers. Although in this day and age I am too young all around. Those old guys are always going for the young ones too. Gotta go for real now. Time waits for no man. Plus the oven timer is beeping me off. Later.
Day Quote. For The BF. This Is His World Now. With A Flower.
Because all the best quotes come from TV. How To Live With Your Parents (For The Rest Of Your Life). I think it’s canceled already, but the wisdom will live forever. Reasons don’t work when you are dealing with the thieves of your youth. So stomp your foot, slouch that back, cross your arms and roll those eyes. Now, dramatically sigh out loud, and repeat after me:
Rational arguments are not going to work with me because I am the child. And the whole point of being the child is your feelings and needs don’t have to make sense, they just have to be addressed.
—Sarah Chalke, as Polly
Bonus Day!
Still working out the kinks in my camera phone. Not all my “files” are making it through. Maybe it’s a new advanced Samsung feature when you try to send pictures through the system it automatically corrupts the file of the crap shots so you don’t even waste your time.
That company is so smart. The first picture is a flower from my neighbors house. I have more. Of course I do. Today is an unexpected day off, so I like to call them the bonus days, in life. My plans are suddenly open and fluid. Maybe I will catch up on sleep. Maybe I will post all day. Maybe I will take a shower and remove all this excess hair from my legs. Yuck. Maybe I will sit on my ass playing Tiny Village. Now that it is my only game and play app, I can really focus on it.
*Quick side note: what do we, you, the general public, think about spending actual real world dollars on these games? I am seriously considering paying cash for crystals because I want to do stuff in this fake world faster. Leave me a note/comment when you can. Thoughts, ideas? Is this the lamest way to spend money ever? I can justify it by saying it’s an early birthday present to myself. Maybe? I got paid today and I have time to burn. These are my “for” arguments.
*Extra quick side note: I have updates on my health. Too fat. Too little exercise. Apparently I need to be doing the “cardio” kind. B/P still a skosh too elevated. I have been increased on my starter meds. But I’d like to D/C them altogether. The MD said I could if I wasn’t a rolly-polly when I come back to see him next time. Lupus titer high and positive again. (Lupus panel negative though. I may have a life-long, general, vague, comes-and-goes, inflammatory disorder to deal with for my golden years. If a face rash and some bad numbers on a blood test is all I get from this over the years, I will be a very happy camper. I can exercise and stay out of the sun. No problem.) I will be heading out to the garage to pull some of my “diet” books and revamp the current food plan. But first I need to get that shower/shave thing out of the way. And believe me I have plans for more postings about this. I already have a title for my new quest in mind. “144 by 44”. See, I will be 44 this year. And my follow up appt is after my birthday. 144 lbs might not be exactly do-able in that time frame, three months, but I can try. I hesitate to throw out my actual weight number because I am not sure if it’s fat or not. It’s a good amount under 200. It’s definitely not slim. But I am a heavy person in general. Like, heavy bones. I know that sounds like an excuse, but I’m like a deceptive bag of concrete. I might look compact and weigh what the number says on the sack, but when you go to pick me up, I-Yi-Yi!! I weigh a ton. And now your back hurts! 144 would be the least amount I have ever weighed as an adult with children. Except for the brief month, many years ago, when I weighed 138 because of a literal diet, of coffee and breath mints, when I was going through some shit. I literally could not eat food without throwing up. Not my fault. But also not a story for this bonus day either. Spoils the fun.
Maybe I will get new grass today. Literally. The village I live in tore up my yard as you may remember from ONE YEAR AGO. Almost to the day. Because of broken water mains. Click to read. Catch up here. Well they are back. Sort of. They have been coming to the house every day this week doing something to the front. Flatten it out. Dig up more. Shore up the edges. Fill in with dirt. Smooth that out. I have got to believe that sod is next. Maybe today?! I hope they hurry. I hear storms are approaching. Storms with really cool names. Derecho.
The following is copied word for word from a weather news site:
A derecho, Spanish for straight, is a widespread and long-lasting storm that comes with fast-moving thunderstorms and rain, and also can bring damaging high winds, hail as big as golf balls as well as tornadoes. Weather forecasters have been warning that this rare weather phenomenon, which last year left a 700-mile trail of damage across the Midwest and mid-Atlantic, this time could hit a swath of states from Iowa to Maryland starting Wednesday.
Yay! At least I won’t be at work and then have to drive in it this time. I also need to seriously update some of the pages on this site. I noticed some old info floating around and we could use a freshening. Let me finish this quick. I’m running out of shower time before these kids get home. I will try to link the yard thing and post the new pics of the yard. And some flowers and probably birds. And lottery news. Still working on the scratch-offs, but I can tell you, so far, we are not winners. Still have to work for the money. I have 4 cards/chances left. Wouldn’t this be a great site if I could just write every day about how much money I have and how I don’t have to do anything, ever, again in real life if I don’t want to? I would just post title after title with some picture taken from my couch: Still Rich. Suckers! Oh to dream….Later.
That would be The Truck. And The Dig. And The Smooth. Hopefully the next picture will be, “The Grass”. Ugh. My kids have started calling me for rides and I am still hairy. Ugh. Bonus Time Shower Time. Although shower time should really be an All-The-Time. Ugh. Wasting Time. Later.
Let’s Take It Down A Notch With My Third Pic From The New Phone
Life is not all that serious. But you know, I get caught up in the typing and before you know it, a five paragraph essay on mortality appears. The above picture illustrates the life-shortening things we did on my last weekend off. First we went and saw Fast 6. It’s a good movie. If you like those kind of movies. And we do.
Spoiler Alert! Seriously. I will be typing info of the spoiler variety right now. If you have seen any of these movies, you know they tease you at the end. Well, guess what? There’s gonna be a Fast 7. I won’t say how they do it, but if you are like me, you might say to yourself, “You know who they should get for these movies? Jason Statham.” And you would tell all the people around you, right away, at the beginning of the movie, because it’s a British, military-type bad guy in this one, and be really annoying about it. But then you’d be totally validated at the end and all self-satisfied ’cause you’re so smart. You could totally be a movie producer person. Whatever.
After the movie we went and got my new phone. Yay! Not gonna lie again. It’s awesome! It’s a beautiful phone. Samsung Galaxy S4, in case you missed that bit of info in my last mush post. It’s all Otter Box’d up so I don’t ruin it at work or in life. Plus it’s not very recognizable in it’s case so bitches can’t steal it! Ha. I also have it functioning now the way I like it, except for a ringtone. I am still trying to figure out if I should go back to my previous one (PriceTag–Jessie J or Peace Of Mind–Boston) or pick a new one altogether. Life is sooo hard right?
Then we went to Sam’s Club for alcohol and hot peppers to bring over to the BF’s mom’s house, because she was making dinner, roast beef sammy’s, because the BF’s brother, was in town from Oregon where he lives now. Whew. Got all that? I could have summed that up better, but I have a little time here to spread my typing wings. So obviously we got wine. Apothic Red–the best mixed red, for the best price, hand’s down, in my opinion, of all the brands that I have tried, right now. I posted about it before. The other wine. Ehh. It was OK. I think we got a bad bottle. Smelled and tasted almost like it was spoiled. Compromised. The cork was really dry and it had that sharp vinegar whiff to it. We drank it though. No ill effects noted. And since we were at the big warehouse center for giant, low-cost items, and we needed more Jack, we bought the economy size bottle. I mean, come on, that’s just smart money. And the peppers. Which were tasty and pretty hot actually and pretty much the smallest jar you can buy there. And a pair of jeans for the boy. He can never find Levi’s in his size, because most stores only get, like, 2 pairs of his, per shipment. But there they were, on the giant table of Levi’s, just waiting for him to come along and riffle through the pile. If you have ever been to Sam’s, you know they check your receipt and your items before you walk out of the door. So we were all carrying something; the wines, the giant Jack, the giant pepper jar; and the lady that checked our stuff said, “Ok, you got, what…wine, bottle, peppers, OK, well yeah, it looks like you got everything you need right there, uh huh.” And off we went. Layed everything so nicely in the trunk and snapped the pic with my new toy. Then we went to the dinner (delicious) and drove the kids out to their dad’s for an overnight.
Sunday was kind of lazy but chore driven. Laundry. (Which honestly, got done, completely–folded and put away–but is now back with a vengeance. I HATE laundry so much.) Breakfast. Where I met the 102 year old lady and her younger sister, a sprightly 95. Then more laundry when we got back home. (This was a before and after session of laundry. There was a lot.) Then we had pizza for dinner and waited for the kids to get home. That was their first and last week of summer vacation. Athletic camps are now in session, starting today, and they will be busy for the duration. I believe school starts for them about August 11 or 19. Yet to be determined. I don’t have a schedule yet anyway. So it’s a mystery. Well, it’s not really a mystery. I could spoil the surprise for them by looking on the school website, but I will let them dream of long, lazy, summer days and nights for a few more weeks.
And that’s it for now. Exciting re-cap of a day-in-the-life, huh? Now do you see why I fear getting old? Boring. Laundry. Breakfast. Alcohol. Oh. Alcohol. That must be the key. Drink and you will forget that you are getting older. As I said yesterday, I really do have a doctor appointment to get to. So I need to end this. My hip still hurts, but I think alcohol could probably fix that little problem too. Hmm. I suppose exercise might achieve that same result. Build up some strength to stave off the decaying process. Maybe I’ll try both. Drinking would probably make the exercise easier and more enjoyable, with less pain. Or send me to the ER with a dislocated hip ASAP. Still, with less pain. Did I mention that I have to get weighed, along with the B/P check and whatnot? That’s what is really going to cause me pain. I will follow up. Expect a new series of exercise-healthy-losing-weight-live-forever-type posting to start appearing in this lazy space. Later.
just shy of pretty 