Maxima Love

August 29, 2013 at 12:59 pm (Cartoons, Day to Day, Family, For Amanda, Maxima, Picture Posts, Posts In Pictures, Random Images, Thank You, Wasting Time In General) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

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That’s my big number. And we are on the way to the golden 200,000. I noticed that Maxima owners really love their car. Maybe it’s because they have been driving them for so long and for so many miles. I spend more money, and am willing to spend more money, to fix it than replace it. I have the 2004 version. (The best shape I think. Very “Maxima”.) Technically, and for full disclosure, I am not the original owner. That would be my BF. And he bought it brand spanking new. But we swapped cars a few years back, and my trade was destroyed in a terrible, totaling, highway accident (no injuries except the car) so I am claiming the Maxima as my own forever and always.

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That’s the whole car. It needs some cosmetic work and it makes some strange noises, but it starts and takes me to work every day. If you love your Maxima, and have some time to burn, send me a comment, or a pic if you want. I know you are out there because I see you driving around in your Maxima, with the same look I have when I drive around in mine. For the most part. When I’m not dog-ass tired or coming home from work at 2 am. But I digress.Maxima people look at other Maxima people. Probably just to compare cars, but whatever. I’m not going to go into the whole big thing. Send me a comment!! We are so aggressive too. Just do it. Please. Anyway…

Let’s try to shake this site up today. My sister, the self-titled queen of all things interesting, decided that my site is too boring for her. So I am starting with fast cars (because that’s a huge reason for loving the Maxima in the first place–speed) and continuing with exciting, upcoming, posts such as, death. And pornography. I’m not kidding. I said death. With pictures. And porn. With pictures. Check back in a few if you are not automatically getting e-mails or following me. And if not, why not? Take the time and do it now. E-mail to the top right, or follow by clicking the link for it. Easy and one less thing to keep track of. I will come to you! Now that sounds exciting all by itself doesn’t it? But right now, I have other pressing matters to attend to that cannot wait. I must go to the local public perishables and supply institution. For long term staple items and body products. Bare bottom body products. Can I even type such scandal? Then I have to visit my pharmaceutical connection. I need to pick up some “medications” there. The good sh*t, that messes with your heart. Then I have to get ready to meet the brain trusts at the education center who will be teaching my children life-saving survival tactics for an ever changing, future based, random, potentially dangerous, world, that they have to be prepared for at all times. Their regimen includes hands on training, as well as written doctrine and instruction. Do not tell me that my life is boring. It is a daily grind to stay alive. And no one, I repeat, no one, gets out alive.

So don’t worry so much. Here’s some of that education in action. A picture that just sums it all up. Left on a note pad, on the coffee table, for us mere humans to decipher as we wish. Shake up the status quo every now and then. Analyze everything, and nothing, at the same time, and draw your own conclusions on how to proceed. Keep moving forward with as much kindness, and humor, as you can muster, and you should be just fine. Deep stuff. Random and hilarious. Like life itself. Later.

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E-MAIL Alert!! Please put me in YOUR inbox!!

November 23, 2011 at 10:38 pm (Day to Day, Pictures, School News, Shameless Self Promotion, Thank You, Updates) (, , , , , )

Lights On! Two chairs. One for me and one for you! See how lonely it looks here without you?? See how long the shadows fall for you? Reaching? Calling? See how far I can stretch a picture to go with a post?

This is definitely filed under, “Shameless Self Promotion”, but I just realized that I can now see who is subscribing to my site and who receives e-mail notifications every time I post! I know some of you out there have been signed up and getting e-mails from me since it has been available, but I was never able to view any of my loyal fans or see where these silly words were going out there. But now I can! I don’t know if the system changed or I just became more aware. Either way, I need a minute of YOUR time to make ME feel special!

I signed myself up to get my own posts and I am hoping that you will take a few minutes and sign yourself up, or try and re-sign your self up again. I’m not sure if it’s only the new subscribers who get listed for me and the old ones don’t. or maybe the e-mail notices are expired and need to be updated…I have no idea. I do know that some of you out there are slow on getting the notifications, so maybe it’s because they updated the system but you’re not in it yet. Anyway,  I know it can be a huge hassle because you have to go back to your e-mail and validate, but it was really easy. One click, seriously, and I was in! If you have been with me since the beginning I may never know you are out there! But at least I’ll know you’ve tried! (Don’t think about that too much because I won’t actually know if you tried or not, but let’s just say I will or can or should be able too.) Moving on….

Even if you are reading this site for the first time you should also sign up. This particular posting is not indicative of my entire site. I have lots of variety. I’m pretty funny too. I won’t lie to you though, sometimes this site really blows. It can be boring or silly or just plain stupid. Sometimes I post a lot and other times I let days and days go by without a single word. There is no theme and no consistency. Thank goodness it’s not how I actually make money. I would be very poor. Well, I’m pretty poor now, but that’s for another post. In fact, I just got accepted today into the Bachelor Nursing Program at the big college and that’s gonna cost even more money I don’t have from the job I still can’t get. See? As my loyal readers will notice, I kind of do have a theme, it’s called, “running off at the mouth and switching mid-paragraph between totally unrelated thoughts.”

I like to ramble. And I like to ramble using as many words as possible. As I was typing the”theme” explanation, I thought of that one word, ramble, that would have summed it up, but I kept typing the long explanation anyway. I’m also leaving all of this in too because it really drives home the point I was trying to make. And since you have probably forgotten the original topic anyway, like I often do, it won’t matter. So if this is the kind of thing you like to read when you are surfing the internet then you better sign up to that e-mail notice option RIGHT NOW!!  I mean, come on, give me a few days or weeks. You can always UN-subscribe!

Also, I post LOTS of pictures! And everybody loves pictures. I love pictures because I don’t have to read anything. And I have to say, some of my pictures are really good. you know, artsy good. Or just really clear and sharp. Detailed and packed with relevance, and, dare I say, some of them have actual, meaning. Oh my. So there’s always that! Teaser alert! I finally got a picture of that red-headed woodpecker! Yes I did! He is so beautiful. I will get him up here just as soon as I stop obsessing over the fact that I have no job and calm down and enjoy the holidays that are fast approaching and giving me heart palpitations at the same time. It doesn’t help that the evil facebook corporation keeps reminding me that I am the only one of my friends that does NOT have a job and therefore I am, essentially, a loser. I know that’s not really true, I am not the only one without a job, but some days, I tell ya…staying home all day and staring at a computer can really be isolating and that’s not good either. Then the extra-evil “Bejeweled Monster” gets me and I’m done for the day. See? I did it again. Just like that. Ramble. It’s weird right? No filter.

The link is at the top of my homepage in the right column. It’s the very first thing listed. Click it, type in your e-mail, type in the safety word, and hit subscribe!

Thank you thank you thank you! Now go read some more and browse around. If not my site, one of my linked sites to the right. Or just go to your home news source and scan around there. Hours and hours are looming ahead to be wasted at our leisure.

One last ramble. If you’ve read me in the last few months you know I am obsessed with that stupid Bejeweled game. It sucks up more of my time then I care to admit and you never get anything for it except a sore shoulder and a cramped up thumb from the same small, repetitive movements. I will literally play and hours will go by. It’s embarrassing. I play for three of us. My two kids and me. And I can get the high scores too. But it just gets wiped out every week and you have to start all over from zero. Frustrating. Anyhoo, I also have a smart phone now. Real smart. At first I was just using it for e-mails and to have the ability to be called for a job or alerted to a further interview AT ANY MOMENT! However, the only thing I do on the stupid thing all day long is play this game called, Words With Friends. I am sure everyone out there has heard of it. Well, how convenient that I can play it off my phone. Never out of touch! I usually lose at this game though. I can’t resist that buzzing sound my phone makes every few hours, or minutes, as someone makes their move and it’s my turn again. So sad. My life has become so sad. And in case you do play and were always wondering the maximum amount of games you can play at any one time?? The answer is 21. So limiting right? I have actually had people just quit me so they don’t have to play anymore. Whatever.

Wrapping up now. The big finish. There was a lot of info here. A lot that I can’t really remember and I am not re-reading. It looks like a lot and I need to get to my games. Last picture. Lights out! Later.

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New Feature! Subscribe to me!

July 21, 2009 at 12:51 am (Day to Day, New Features) (, , , , , , , , , )

As if you couldn’t get enough of me before…now you can have MORE!

Oh yeah. And it’s free! Just look over to the right there →, and plant those eyeballs on the, “Subscribe to just shy of pretty by e-mail” link.

Click it and give up your info.

Now, you will never miss, even one, of the extremely witty things I say, ever again. You WILL be e-mailed every time I lay hands to keyboard and hit “Publish”.

I wish I could be you. I’m just kidding. But really, won’t it make your life easier? Now you don’t have to randomly check if I added anything new. You’ll always know. And I have written some pretty good stuff in the last few months that you may have missed, if I do say so myself.

Even my mom says that it’s just like talking to me in real life! I just go on and on. That’s a compliment, trust me.

I’m not above begging either. Please, please, please, please…put me on your list. Subscribe to me. Please, it makes me feel special!

Thank you thank you thank you. Now go over there →

And let’s hook up!!

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My fans await…

June 8, 2009 at 4:39 pm (Day to Day, Movies) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

And here I am being lazy all day. Seriously lazy. It’s 3 pm and I am just now up and doing stuff. Too bad too, cause it’s really nice outside. I probably could have done tons more.

I’m adding a warning right here, before I get a call from my sister telling me how lame and annoying I am:

This post contains a long, possibly boring narrative of my days and nights since Saturday morning, before the party. Proceed with caution (and a drink for maximum enjoyment, I recommend the Vodka Mixer, but only if you’re over 21. Please drink responsibly.) if you continue. I cannot be held accountable for what you think is funny or not. End of warning.

I was awake at 10 am. And I had coffee and watched tv. I checked my e-mail because the kids both got their own e-mail accounts and they like to send messages and videos and chat back and forth even though we are all in the same house. It’s really fun. They send an e-mail, hand me the computer, I open my e-mail, read and reply, and hand the computer back to them. Only kids can give you this kind of entertainment.

Anyway, as luck would have it, they are at their dads right now (which is why I can lay around until 10 am in bed on a Monday. School is over for them and mine is on Tuesday’s) so since they are actually out of the house I knew there would be messages. And there were. Checked and replied. Drink more coffee. Watch a movie.

Ladies, (or guys), if you are going to cheat on your spouse, watch this movie first: Clash By Night

It’s surprisingly violent and straightforward. I flipped it on thinking that old movies sometimes are the best on days like this. And I was right. The poster and IMDB kind of make it seem like a Marilyn picture, but it’s not. It’s about love and the giant mess it makes when you get married, and have kids, and have lovers and families and live by that sexy ocean when it’s hot outside…but judge for yourself…that could be the Bailey’s talking.

After the movie, I decided that a shower might be nice. I was kind of hungry too, but way to lazy to make anything or even go out to get something. So I did all the personal hygiene stuff I like to do when the kids and BF are gone, played some Pocket Poker (lost everything) and moved onto the mail and the couch. It’s windy and keeps trying to rain. I wish it would because then I don’t have to feel guilty about sitting inside like a hermit.

After the paperwork I had to do was done, I moved onto laundry, and vacuuming. This is gripping reading I know. (Shut up! Aman-duh!) I am just now getting the house back to it’s pre-party condition. Not that there was a big mess or anything. My sisters and family toatally helped clean up! Thank you! I just like to remove our daily living paraphernalia from the public view. But, you have to put it all back because you find out you need it at hand. Stuff like, my food journal, and bills, and magazines and school books, things like that.

Speaking of the party…it was good. Really good I thought. Party was scheduled to start at 2 pm. It rained at exactly 2 pm.

But then it stopped and warmed up just enough for  everyone to go outside. I’d say a majority of those invited actually came. Very successful. You never know with these kinds of things. You want the party to NOT be a disaster. It’s really all you can hope for. The food arrived, everyone ate, drank, socialized, and left. Last people out were my sisters. 11 pm ish, I think. Not bad at all.

Sunday morning was raining a bit. Mason had grass to cut. Another job! Then we went to the movies. Land of the Lost

It’s not bad. But it’s not worth paying full price unless you really LOVE Will Ferrell. There are some really funny parts and some that just aren’t. Also, alot of swearing and jokes and visuals that might be a little too adult for the younger crowd. Mine are 10 and 11 and I was cringing a few times and working up the explanations in my head.

We had a gift card so it wasn’t too bad. The food cost more than the admission! Bleah!  Then we motored the children on over to their daddy’s. The BF and I watched Mr and Mrs Smith for the gazillionth time, ate food and hit the sack. And here I sit today.

Laundry is cooking, books are waiting, pictures need posting…I could spice up the story with some sordid little details about how I earned a buck-oh-two on Saturday night, or what vodka, 7-up and bags of ice brought to the party Sunday night, but I bet you can think of a million better things than I could come up with, including the truth. This site is interactive! YOU tell ME and I’ll let you know if you’re close.

Which reminds me, my brothers favorite movie is coming on tv soon. You can’t handle the truth! At least I think it still is. I personally don’t care for the “Jack” myself but I try to be nice. I prefer his other favorite Keyser Söze. I’m not sure why, but if it’s on tv I watch it, no matter where in the story or what time it is. I’ve watched it at 4 in the morning on Christmas Eve. Why is it even on at that time?? It’s a sickness.

Alright look around for some pictures. I have more stuff to come, including a caterpillar update. What are those crazy cocoons up to?? You know you want to know.

Find out! Later!

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