I can finally use my cup!!!
It’s officially official!! I am an RN!!!
I passed NCLEX and even got my official letter in the mail telling me I passed and would I please fill out this one last form and send 50 more dollars to the state and we will issue a brand new fancy official nurse license!!! GLADLY I will. I had that check written and mailed within an hour!
I took the test at the end of July, got my internet result in 2 days and got the official letter last week. I haven’t posted because, one, the shock and numbing disbelief that it could really be done and true still hasn’t worn off, and two, the BF was on vacation so we took that week to do TONS of back breaking, hard labor on the house and catch up with all the chores we have neglected up to this point. I cannot begin to tell you how good (and suspicious) it feels not to have ANYTHING to study for. Literally. Nothing. I am done with that whole part. Now it’s just adding letters to my name and RN status. I will just become MORE of a nurse, with specialized skills and advanced degrees. That feels so good to type.
Anyway, the house looks great. Nice and fresh and up-kept. We even ordered the last of the windows to be put in before winter. Laundry is done. House is clean. I went thru my school notes and recycled the things I will never need again. And I am weeding out the closet-crap that has built up from many months of shoving things away, out of sight. Even my mom and sister were shocked at how clean the house actually looked! That means it must have been pretty bad. Oh well, no time to worry now. It will stay this clean for approximately 5 more days as the kids are due home from their very, seemingly, long vacation. I miss them a ton, actually. This particular 2 weeks seems extra long this year. Time ticks. They keep me up and moving forward.
There is still much to do, but I feel happy. And hopeful. The hard part of my 1000 day journey is over. I have 38 days left of it to get a job. Then school must start again. For all of us. Kids are rounding out Junior High, 7th and 8th grades this year, and the BF and I are in a race to the Bachelor’s. Who will get theirs first?? My classes start next week and I think I have fewer to take. The BF’s start the week after, but his courses are shorter AND online. So I will keep you posted. Then we have moving to think about and a whole other 1000 day plan to institute, although I think I am going with 500 days this time, with possible extensions.
It’s exciting to go down a brand new road, I’ve been on that other one a long time now. Even though I said it publicly on facebook, I will say it here too…this whole trip was not possible without the love and support of my kids, my BF, my family and friends, who constantly had to hear every detail and live thru every one of my ups and downs, passes and failures, and fears of failing, whether warranted or not. All the late nights, the early mornings, the constant brokeness; the take out food, the dirty house, the piles and piles of laundry and stacks of books; for all the stuff I missed and all the things I was too tired to do; for wearing all those wrinkly clothes and never complaining!! I love my kids. I love my family. I love my friends. I love my BF. Without him by my side and patiently waiting for the end, and taking care of everything that I couldn’t…thank you. I love you. I could not be here without you.
And that’s really it for now. Last chapter of this gripping tale coming right up. Where will I work??? Mystery! Stay tuned! Here is one final shot of the proof that I had to have to believe my dream had finally come true!
What a glorious, beautiful 4-letter word! Say it with me….PASS!!! Cheers!
Can anyone say National Jr. Honor Society?
How do you spend the money you get for achieving high honors in academics when you are 13?? If you are my son, you buy a bunch of Nerf guns!!
But really cool Nerf guns. With extra foam bullets. They got two shotguns and two automatic guns. The shotguns even have fake “shell casings” that pop out every time you re-load. These are the kinds of things my kids like. Even from my old fart perspective, I do have to say, they are pretty fun. And, as a bonus for me, the process to purchase them was highly entertaining.
We were quite the spectacle at the store, picking them out. My children were trying to pretend that they were getting gifts for their younger cousins instead of admitting that these were all for them. There were lengthy discussions in front of the display about the merits of one type of gun over another and who would like which gun better. Do we like the automatic? Should we go with the shotgun? How many extra bullets? What color? What design? Nobody was paying attention. Nobody really cares what you buy, least of all the checkout lady. For good measure though, my daughter asked for a gift receipt. So we, I mean, they, their cousins, who were having a birthday party that weekend, could return them if they wanted. Elaborate lies! She explained this all to the register girl, who I am 100% sure did not give a shit. Pardon my French. A thousand kids a day go walking through and I doubt that two almost-teenagers buying Nerf guns hardly raises an eyebrow.
Props go out to my son who generously spent his smart-money on himself AND his sister. He bought Stevie the same guns and they split the extra bullets. He never even hesitated. So that’s one more thing I can add to my “like” list. And it’s an important one. Really. Good. Kids. I am a lucky mom! Later.
I guess we’re next
Tornado’s just rolling across America. Here in the midwest we are waiting. I live in Chicago and I can tell you that it’s raining now. We are under watch until 1 pm central time. It’s dark, it’s raining pretty steady and I have no TV. The satellite has been lost. Obviously I have internet, but that usually blinks out too.
The rain is not coming down really hard so I may be ok for awhile. The kids are at school. It’s pretty safe there. I had to remind them that tornado sirens mean you stay IN the building and cover your head. Fire drills are the one you run outside for! Makes a big difference! That’s kind of a running joke we have because when they were little, the daycare used to do drills with the kids. It was to help them learn the different emergencies and sirens and what to do. On one particular test day, the FIRE drill went off and almost all the kids ran into the safety room and kneeled against the wall covering their heads. Except my son, who was trying to get people/kids to run OUT of the building, knowing it was a fire drill, not a tornado. Needless to say many children perished in this fake fire, except my son and daughter and a few others.
ALERT: just in case this is not absolutely clear…this was a fire drill. No actual fire occurred. No children were hurt or ever in danger of being hurt. It was only a practice drill!!
The teacher praised him for being so smart and not falling for the doubt, that most likely crossed his mind, thinking he might have been wrong. Especially since most of the kids refused to leave with him. Anyway, I was proud that day. He knew what the situation was, he tried to help the others, and he didn’t back down from what he knew to be true. My little hero! That was a long time ago and it’s funny to remember, because I haven’t thought about it in a long time.
Anyway, I will try and get some pics. Everybody loves to run outside in tornado weather and take pictures! Apparently I am no different! But I am ready, just in case. All showered, dressed, house contained and prepped if I have to hide in the closet or get the hell out of here. Luckily my son just bought a bunch of flashlights and lanterns for camping this weekend, but they will come in handy if we lose power later. I have enough coffee for the morning and a way to heat it if needed. Priorities.
I’ll be taking a break from the school stuff for a few days, at least one or two, because I am a bit burnt out. Those two days of extra classes didn’t make me feel better. I thought I had a pretty good grasp on what I know, but when I left yesterday, I felt less than confident, especially when I started getting some of the answers wrong. Without a bunch of boring, endless details, let’s just say there is a method that this class teaches and I am not really good at method learning. But I am withholding judgement, because this just may not have been the best week to jump right back in. And I did pay for it. Voluntarily. And they say it does help. I think I just need some time between classes over and new classes starting. More than three days. So we shall see.
Ok it’s quiet again here and the TV is back. Still under tornado warning. Still 1 pm. I hear birds! Crazy birds out there chirping all around, hopping in that wet grass and drinking up those puddles of water. Now is a good time to go survey the yard and take out some garbage. Be back later.
As usual though, it will only be inanimate objects
My face is NOT conductive to picture taking. I do not know why the camera hates me!! Plus my skin is all jacked up! Blah blah blah….
Look!
Pretty flowers!
Graduation! Anti-climactically followed by MORE school!
I spent two hours, apparently looking like a non-stop-grinning-photo-posing idiot, at my first formal graduation ceremony, preceded by two hours of standing around in very high, very painful shoes (but looking sexy–winkity wink), waiting for said graduation. I will say that I greatly disappointed my mother by not attending my high school graduation, (although our recall of the reason why differs–another wink there)….but…. hopefully, this kind of makes up for it!
After the ceremony…we took some pics, hung out for a bit, talked and laughed, remembering the good times and the bad, exchanging well wishes and promises to keep in touch….one last look around….and we left the school, tears in our eyes, painfully hobbling toward the car (my shoes were REALLY killing my feet!!) to my future….
For one whole day!! HAHA. I know my sissy was probably reading that, like, “WTF?? What the HELL is she talking about??!!??” Hee hee…As you can see I am still just as funny as usual. Anyhoo…we went to a restaurant with my family and had lunch. Then we all went home. I have never wanted to sit on my ass and do absolutely NOTHING more than that moment. I think I said that after my finals too. I think I probably say that alot. Hmmm. So I did. It was a nice night. The BF went to hang with his friends and play poker and I watched terrible movies with my kids. Like really terrible. Sharktopus. Dinoshark. Mongolian Death Worm—kind of a Tremors rip off but who are we to complain when we willingly pay money to rent them?
I just got home from my extended class, that I voluntarily registered for so I can prepare for the Nclex. Graduating is good, but it doesn’t get me a job. I need a license for that. So please hang out with me four more weeks!! It will be fun! Less pressure, more downtime. I am just making sure that I know all that I need to know, and everything I don’t know I won’t feel so stressed about because I did what I could to prepare!
So anyway, I want to put a few more pics around this site but my phone doesn’t want to cooperate. High tech photography is what I rock over here! But this is some of the loot…Flowers!—More flowers!—(Mommy and BF and children!) Shiny, helium, Mylar balloon! (Sissy!) A box of chocolates! (Sissy!) A card that tells me I cannot talk about school anymore for at least 2 family parties! (Sissy!) A beautiful angel figurine with a “don’t kill anyone” message—but much more poetically phrased! (Other sissy! And my almost-driving, little (?) bigger than me, niece!) A big, fat, check…cha-ching! (Other mom!) T-shirts with RN on them (Beth and Wayne!)—that I can never actually wear in the general public! They tell us that advertising is not always the best option. And it’s not because we don’t want to help people—of course we do! I would not have gone through all this stress just to ignore people! The problem is that I am still just a person, without a medical degree and without access to hospital type stuff when I am not at the hospital! I would LOVE to think that I am so smart and so brilliant enough, that I can diagnose or answer any and all questions anyone might have about anything! Sadly, I am not. Not even close. Bummer. But I do LOVE my t-shirts! They make me so proud to be just who I am! Another nurse! It’s awesome!
I only listed these things, not to brag, but because I want to say thank you. Again. I appreciate the time you spent with me Saturday, and the gifts are nice, but I would have been cool without anything!! So thank you for the “extra” stuff! You guys are all awesome! Love you!
Alright that’s enough. I never mean for these to be soooo long and they always are. My goal during (my last—forever) “pre-job summer” (besides study for nclex, prepare a resume, write letters, fill out apps, go on interviews, get a job, get a job, get a job) is to stream line this website again. Get it back to quick and mindless, BUT amusing and relevant, posts, that I can handle WHILE working a 12 hour/day job! High goals as usual. Especially since this may never have been considered amusing and certainly not relevant. But I have a degree now! I am one piece of paper smarter than I was last week! See?
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!?! (c’mon that was the PERFECT segway…no??)
Alright look for some pics and some “found money” updates. I have about a year and a half of dirty, crusty street coins, sitting in little bowls waiting to be tallied. And I have to do a little reading for tomorrow….so how about this…abrupt end. Bye!
Next up, GRADUATION!!!!
What?!?! Already??!! HA!
Despite all my attempts to thwart my meticulous study habits by posting here way too much when I should have been pouring over nursing textbooks, I have somehow managed to pass every single test set before me. And on Saturday of this week they are going to let me walk across that big stage, with all my school friends, and family in the audience, and graduate and move onto the NEXT BIG THING!!
TWO YEARS! (and two years before that just to get to these two past years) I could cry. And I do. Every single time I think too much about how I got here. Where I was and where I am and where I am going.
Life is extremely unpredictable and I would advise anyone who feels like it won’t ever change, to wait. Wait one more day and I guarantee, it ALWAYS changes! We steer our own ships. We do. Talk to me and I will tell you. I am proof that any plan can be changed. I’ve had 5 year plans, 3 year plans, 1 year plans, 1 week plans, ONE DAY plans and they all have one thing in common: They have all been completely and totally “F’d” up, thrown out, re-planned and revised into unrecognizable versions of their original ideas, many times over. And here I am anyway at the end of the latest 1000 day plan. And guess what? Tomorrow I will have ANOTHER plan. It just goes on and on…
You have to excuse me, I am feeling even MORE mushy and sentimental because the hardest thing I have ever done is finally over. I reached for the dream and I didn’t fail. And I am never afraid of failing, because I always try 100%, and I never give up, but, I am always terrified of failing, because I always try 100% and I never give up! One of my school friends posted on her page today:
“Fall down seven times, get up eight.”
I say get up every single time you fall. It’s true that you can’t fail at anything if you never try anything, but you can’t win anything either.
So that’s it for tonight. I will go back to silly stuff later, but I have to say thanks now that it’s over.
Thank you to my family. My kids rock. They have been counting down all these days with me. We made it. All those days that stretched before us. All those days behind us now. And soon, we get to start a new count! Life is just that. Living. Every day. Keep moving and at least you are DOING something!
Thank you to my other family…mom and sissy’s and brother…listening to me talk for 2 years about lots of stuff that no one else cares about….thank you. I’ve said it before. Lots of times. And I promise, I will stop now.
Friends, school folk, family of my family…same as above! Even if you thought I was full of it, you let me talk and for that I thank you.
Fans, strangers, readers, people who accidentally stumble on this looking for something else more interesting…thank you for following the journey. This whole little blog thing started out kind of pointless and random. It has morphed from my general thoughts on different unassociated topics, to more of a place that I can record the things in my life that I can go on and on about and no one can stop me! Unless you click it off! Hopefully you find it as fun and interesting as I do when I write it! And if you don’t…thanks anyway for reading it and probably hoping it will get better! It’s like a car accident right?? Can’t. Look. Away.
And finally…most importantly….and my last bit of mush in high gear…thank you to my BF. That’s boyfriend. You are the most patient man in the history of the world. You have no reason to put up with half the crap I do (or don’t do…haha) and still you stay. I’m glad you stuck it out and like I have been saying all along…it is almost over! The future is here! Well mostly here…you know I still got that one, last, little test to take, that the state requires, eye roll, before I go working on real people! But hey…easy peasy lemon squeezy….we are as good as there! Anyway, to sum up: I love you. Thank you.
Ok. This is way longer than I wanted it to be (as usual). Tomorrow I get fingerprinted! I will be forever on the grid now. More importantly, I have to go and watch my son get inducted into the National Junior High Honor Society! We are a family of smarty smarty pants! The future IS here!
Dream big and do something awesome! For yourself and anyone else in your world! From the bottom of my heart….to all of you and yours….thank you. Have a great and wonderful night.
One more picture because I knew it was here somewhere
And I just LOVE to waste time when I should be studying. Seriously. Two stinking tests left! Focus!! But since the picture is here and I am already typing….
After all that talking in the long post I wrote the other day, I actually DID go out and ride this here motorcycle. I was a little worried because it is bigger (and heavier) than the one I “trained” on, but, no fear! It was fine. Felt good. Felt even better because this bike is newer and all the parts and signals and gears work exactly the way they are supposed to! Anyway…that’s all about that for now. I prob won’t talk about it anymore unless I fall off…so let’s hope it NEVER comes up again!
As for my tests…Lab Test was alright. Didn’t get enough points to raise my grade, but didn’t miss any to lower it either. Renal Test was 100%. Grade stays the same. Final is Monday. This is where I can win it or lose it. Again. Unbelievable. I want that A pretty bad, and I am not the only one this time. I think there may be several of us going for it. Pressure!! Big finish!! Then we have an exit exam that has to be passed. Final is important but that only gets you half a chance to graduate. Anyway…enough. Sorry A, I am bringing one of my books this weekend…just some review over birthday cake and vodka!! It’s almost over and the dream gets closer….
Going for my daily dose of B/P control and then to the books! Maybe more later…I have SO many pics and so many things to catch up on! I know everyone can hardly wait! Haha. See ya later!
Ummm, I should probably be studying
But it’s soooo nice outside! And I really want to go ride the motorcycle! But, I am afraid to go out by myself. It’s probably the best time to get on and get used to it, but I feel kind of stupid practicing on the street. And if I fall off or something happens then I am really in trouble. I guess I’ll just have to wait until the weekend.
Let’s see…I have also wasted most of the morning doing things like paying bills and cleaning laundry. Yay.
And…I did some self-care maintenance that my sister may not like too much….I colored my own hair! With a box product! And then I cut it! I am so sorry A, but I had too!! I was feeling so old and gray, and even though I am an almost pretty, cool chick, my hair gave me away at the hospital yesterday. Usually people are really kind and humor me when they claim they can’t guess how old I am. They never think I am my real age, but not yesterday. This woman—who was very, very, nice and not unkind at all—just asked me what I have been doing all this time between nursing and whatever the hell else I must have been doing…”since you aren’t as young as some of these other ones around here” Man. Totally busted as the old lady on the floor! So I told her the basic truth about all of us old folks—second career. Total flip on the job we started doing as the ‘yutes” we were (that was for you A, remember at the arboretum—yutes—hahahaha–we still think that’s pretty funny), to the job I’m going to end up doing for the rest of my life. Wish I had started out here, but timing and circumstance just wouldn’t have it that way…but it’s all good now. Anyway. She was a great lady and I had a great day. Which leads me to my next bit of happy….
Last clinical as a student! And I had the best day! (Second only to my ER clinical….you never forget your first love)…anyway…I could go on and on and I know that no one except me likes to hear about it so I will just say that I had 2 of the best nurses for my last 2 days, who taught me more than I could have hoped for this late in the game. I got to do all my skills and even some new ones. Excellent hospital, excellent clients, excellent nurses and staff that were kinder than they needed to be. Even though they will never see this or know it’s about them, I am forever grateful to have my last days of “hand holding” be held by them. Thank you.
So before we get all mushy here…let’s get back to my hair. I colored it and I was skeptical. And afraid. I could hear my sisters voice inside my head telling me how sorry I was going to be. But it turned out really good. Like, really good. A nice color. Not brassy. Not fake looking. I had picked the color closest to my actual hair, because all I wanted was to cover those pesky grays. And it worked! It’s really natural looking. Did a pretty good job on those gray ones too! And of course, I cut it most of the time myself any way. I limit it to my bangs because they grow in my eyes and I start looking a little nerd-sweaty when they part in the middle…not a good look. But I have to say my hair looks like I just left a salon. I know you won’t believe me sister, so I took pictures. Quite nice. And good enough for now until I can get out to see you after school is over!
And my hair must just look so good, because I went to go get myself lunch (Jimmy John’s—I am kind of having a serious problem with that place lately—it’s like every other day now–but so good) But not the point. The point is, TWO, yes, TWO guys, on their own, and separately, were giving me the eyeballs and trying to hit on me! Ha. This hair is so powerful! Is “hit on me” even a phrase still used these days?? I don’t think it’s happened to me in a while…but it did today! We don’t need the details…just the fact that it’s still a possibility is soothing enough. Glad I shaved today too! That kind of inner confidence really makes the men take notice! I feel like I should go buy new underwear or something! HA!
And don’t worry sister or anyone else, I already told the BF. No need to get crazy. I just got talked up, no biggie, but in the end I just took my stuff and left. I know better then to mess up a good thing! And to the BF: You’re the only one for me! XO
Ok that’s it. Kids will start trickling home so I better get back to the books—so it looks like I was actually doing something constructive.
And as a side note—the weather is turning a bit overcast here now, so I guess I don’t have to worry about riding that motorcycle after all. Excuses excuses!
Lab Final is up next. Then the Renal Test. I will post if I can. Later.
Thank you 2 dimes on the ground!
As stupid as that seems. And as stupid as it is that an entire MONTH has gone by, again, and I can’t find time to come here and bore all you faithful fans with my one track life!
So here is some more about school, in case you were wondering and worried!
We had our first cardiac test yesterday at school. The semester is winding down. Everyone is hoping to graduate in May and they crank up the curriculum to put us all at ease. NO. Last four weeks, deep into the heart and kidneys of mankind! NOT easy content. Not for the faint of heart (pun intended) or weak willed. Cardiac moves like a rollercoaster. Lots of stuff inside that fist sized muscle that runs your body non-stop (hopefully), 24/7, for every waking and sleeping moment of your entire time on Earth. It even runs your body BEFORE you set down into the actual atmosphere. It starts pumping your teeny tiny, unformed, tadpole body 4 weeks into fetus hood. But we all don’t need an anatomy lesson.
The point is, when I pulled up to the school at 7:30 am to start classes, I got out of my car, looked down, and there were two, shiny dimes right at my feet! Of course I picked them up (street money people! Even tho I have been horrendously bad at logging in all the money I have found for about the, oh, last YEAR or so….I WILL catch it up! I promise. I HAVE alot that I have found…really.) Anyhoo…2 dimes…20 cents…20 questions. I was hoping that was a good sign to indicate that I will be getting all 20 questions correct.
Well I guess it worked…superstitious! 100% on the test! Very happy. I am attempting to get that A again. I am fighting an uphill battle because I did so bad on that first damn test. So now it’s all trying to get the points back. It is still possible numerically and what a pain! Too much pressure and really, all I need to do is pass the dang things! Whatever…we all need something to keep us moving forward right?
So that’s all. I have so much to do today, per the BF, and here I am writing about found money. So I know you will see this and YES, I am wasting some time here, BUT, my care plan is done. (Was done by 8:30) and I did two loads of laundry already. Cardiac is sitting here next to me waiting for me to wind this up. My people need to know these things!
I also have to update on my 10K….Successful! Finished! And on my own power! BEFORE the time allotted! Mostly because of my sister, who not only beat my time, but because she just trained and pushed us and kicked butt and made me finish! So props to you and congrats to us!! FYI—it was soooooo cold that day too. YUK! We were running just to stay warm. Chicago ya know. It was 40 degrees and threatening to rain when we ran at 7am, and 70 degrees and sunny by the afternoon when I was driving home. What a crock! I wasn’t gonna actually comment right now about it, I was saving it for later, but oh well, now it’s done, so we’ll do it again next year and I’ll talk more then!
Alright, alright, I am getting off now. Need to do more homework and laundry, before the kids get here. We need to go bowl out and shop for a few more things and pack them up to go for the weekend with their dad. They get to go to Kentucky and fish and swim for 4 days while I freeze and read about heart attacks! I think there’s a holiday in there somewhere too….but it’s not one that I do anything for so I will try and keep this posted and updated. Love you honey….all will be well. End.
just shy of pretty 