Breaking News! ANOTHER Tree Branch Falls In My Yard On A Windy Day!

May 30, 2013 at 11:40 am (Day to Day, Tree Trouble, Weather) (, , , , , , , , , , )

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Shocking, right?! Imagine that. Another tree branch cluttering up my yard.  Not to insult nature or anything, but this limb was already dangling. It’s been hanging on, by the skin of its splintery teeth, figuratively speaking, for about 2 weeks now. So it’s not like we needed hurricane winds to knock it down. Just a nice, steady, flow of air, blowing every few minutes through the high up branches, with the occasional bursty gust. We’ve been on fall watch every day. You know: Look up when you go out. Check the wind. Check the rip. Don’t stand under it. Blah blah blah. The way you do when branches are a constant and real threat in your daily life. You would think, by now, no more branches could fall. But, same as me, you would be wrong. Apparently there is always one more branch that needs to make a home on my lawn. It was my own fault, anyway, yet again. I dared to move, and remove, some of the previous limbs and branches from the grass on my day off, Tuesday. I had the nerve to try and “clean” the yard so that the neighbors don’t call the debris police and complain. Those trees were probably standing there thinking, “Psshh. Look at this stupid girl. Dum Dum. She likes to move sticks? Watch this little trick.” And here it is. One more for my collection. Nice try universe. I am not impressed. Only one? Really? Please, tree. I am a professional, serious collector. This limb didn’t even make a loud noise when it hit the ground. I mean, I heard it, but it’s not like I ran to go see what happened. It’s not even worth my time to go out there and move it. So there. Now that I have sufficiently pissed off, and smited, the powers-that-be, and probably just jinxed the rest of my day, I guess, maybe, I will go outside, and move my present from the gods. I mean, I have children to think about; I will offer thanks, and wait for the lightning to strike.

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Smokin’ In The Boys Room

May 26, 2013 at 12:48 pm (Day to Day, Employed Posts!, Family, Food News, For Jeff the BF, For Mason, For Stevie, Giant Food, Holiday, Homemade, Thank You, Weather) (, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , )

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And by “boys room”,  I mean the outside. While I work this weekend, my BF has decided to do many manly things, like, work on his motorcycle, cut large tree limbs with a chainsaw, and smoke much meat. It sounds like so much fun I just wish I could have had these days off to be here for all of it. Ahem. No, really. (Not really). I like to spend my holiday weekends working and taking care of sick people and listening to their families tell me what a crap job I’m doing. It’s what I got into this profession for. That rewarding feeling of spending more hours with other people’s families instead of my own. Without sarcasm, I really do like my job. It’s just some families make it very difficult to keep calm. The patients are fine. It’s just the families sometimes. Still, I think it will be better than the manual labor that needs to be done here. Sweaty, with heavy lifting. Oh wait, that’s my job too. Ha. OK. Enough. That’s my work rant.  Back to the meat!

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Apparently this is stuff you need. Along with a starter tube thing that gets the coals going, a temp gauge, (actually two temp gauges, one for the cooker and one for the meat), water for steam, spices, herbs, liquids, “rubs”, side dishes, buns, etc…and of course: The Meat. This will all cost you approx. 90 dollars or so. If you had to buy your own smoker, that could be an extra 100-500 dollars, depending on quality and advanced smoking technology. Or something. This smoker in the picture was the gift the BF got for working so hard at his job for this many,  past 15 years. It seems like it’s nice smoker machine. I have just been informed that the meat is at 162 degrees. The number we are looking for is 190 I believe. We are doing pulled pork as the maiden smoking. I keep typing “we”, but I literally have done NOTHING except take the pictures and type this. Soon, I will get dressed and leave, so I won’t even be here for the big finish. But, of course I have a preview. Please feast your eyes below on three hunks of pure animal flesh, cooking and smoking, slowly, and at a certain temperature, for maximum tenderness and pullability. It really smells good too:

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Two on top, one below. That sounds like a good name for a band or a book title. The key to cooking this right, I am told, is slow and low. Also, coincidentally a good band name or book title. At any rate, what we want is to put it in our mouths and not even have to chew. The meat should literally pull apart and melt like butter on our palates and slide juicily and effortlessly down our throats to our waiting tummies without any pesky chewing involved. But usually it’s on a  bun with sauce, so please, family, while I am gone, chew a little, please. Bread mostly needs to be chewed, somewhat, to break it down. Then swallow.  No need to ruin a good weekend with “Heimlich’s” or “ambulances” or “hospitals” or “morgues”. Thank you.

Thus ends the meat post for today. I hear and smell lots of manly things going on in the neighborhood today, so I need to get the hell out of here! The outside temp is up to 75 degrees. Sunny and beautiful for the Midwest. The meat temp is at a cool 165. The BF is cutting sticks with the chainsaw. The boy/son is playing XBox in his room enjoying none of the outside weather. The daughter is still at my sissy’s house and will prob go from there to her cousins house to spend the night, after she stops here first to eat meat. She loves meat. Yes, I see what I typed there, but I’m leaving it. It’s too early (for me) to try and fix the innuendo. She’s 14 for cry-yi. Some girls are salads and try a vegetarian phase, not mine. She is steak all the way.

Let them eat meat! And don’t forget it’s Memorial Weekend. Hug a vet! Thank a soldier while you are grilling those hot dogs and drinking that beer! Even if you just send up a big toast and a cheer into the great unknown. It’s all good karma to the universe. Later.

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We interrupt this program

July 3, 2011 at 9:20 am (Day to Day, Motorcycle News, Wasting Study Time Posts, Weather) (, , , , , , , , )

Due to weather and my inability to not help people when they need it. It’s annoying to be sure. But hey, karma right? And what did I really lose anyway? A so-so buzz, computer access, TV watching, laundry folding and the brain numbing joy of sitting on my couch or on my back patio staring at that big white wall.

More heavy storms rolled in again on the first, and that 100 degree weather the news people were predicting finally made it over here yesterday. It was nap-inducingly hot. But I stayed cool with my motorcycle riding. Finally. The BF got a new bike and he’s making me go out so I can get “practice” and be “more comfortable”. I have to say, it’s fun, but stressful. I’m pretty nervous with traffic and I need to work on my stop-start skills. I need to be faster off the line so I don’t get squashed.

And is it just me, or does there seem to be a news story everyday of some poor slob getting killed on his/her motorcycle by a truck?? I wear a helmet but I’m not sure I will fair any better just because my brain isn’t physically all over the street. The word is you don’t think about the bad stuff. Pay attention and don’t do anything stupid. It’s seriously like learning how to drive all over. I need to re-train myself on how to “see” the road. I think I am taking today off.

Plus, two of my schoolmates took their big test and passed! So happy for them. A little bit jealous. A little bit scared. A little bit guilty and anxious. We all want to pass. So I really should be studying. How often do I type those exact words in one of these rambles? I should get paid for it and I would be rich.

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