Stevie’s Joke of the Day! Double Fun!! Quadruple Improvements!!!!

September 27, 2011 at 6:35 pm (Stevie's Joke of the Day!, Wasting Study Time Posts) (, , , , , , , )

That headline is no joke. I have made a break through on this new computer and I feel like I have won the lottery! Besides the hilarious jokes I am about to unleash upon you unsuspecting readers, I have uncovered the elusive mystery of the Windows Photo Gallery editing secrets. You will all be thanking me now! Mere hours ago that picture above would have had a giant arm in it because ever since we got the new computer (with the 2010 Microsoft Word program, which is also awesome!! Seriously. I was a die hard lover of 2007. Seemless transition, more options, excellent results in all my papers. Speaking of which…I have again successfully done every pointless, time-wasting activity I could do today in order to not have completed my school assignment. If only I could find some magic editing button/function to type these damn papers for me…what was I interrupting again with extra random thoughts?? Oh yeah…) I have been unable to figure out how to crop a picture or alter it in any way. This has distressed me greatly. But. No more! I have the key to the kingdom now! And it’s even cooler than you can imagine. It not only crops but it can add effects, change the colors, tone it up, tone it down, make it brighter, unblur it…(I hope unblur it, because in my attempts at framing the perfect shots, because I was unable to crop or fix a pic, they don’t always come out clear and sharp as they appear in my camera screen. OMG, I can go on an on about nothing.)

Paragraph. For all your trouble you can have two hilarious jokes today. And they go with the picture! That’s the double fun. Those jokes, plus my ability to now use newer technology AND find a reason to use that picture of the glass duck is the quadruple improvement part. Lucky day! Now if only I could get this paper done. Time is a ticking. Laugh at this (with title credits–who told it, who laughed hardest):

1. Three guys walked into a bar. The fourth guy ducked. (Mason, nobody. No one ever gets this joke. Think about it…..)

2. Why didn’t the hen cross the road? Because she was too chicken. (Stevie, Mason. I admit I didn’t really get this one. The kids thought it was really funny and tried to explain why, but I think it might be a Jr. High thing.)

The Bonus Joke. For reading all the way to here, and because I made this one up and the kids laughed so I’m throwing it in the ring as a freebie:

Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wasn’t a chicken.

Feel free to share the love. These jokes are feathered gold. Sure to quack you up. I will stop now.

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2 Comments

  1. Lorraine said,

    Is this duck really this color or did you do some photo shop voodoo?

    • masnstevy said,

      Yes ma’am it is actually that color. I took several shots and picked the one that highlighted the blues and golds. Tom is actually in charge of its care as we gave it to him for his birthday. We salvaged it from a very fancy estate sale….hahahaha!

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