MW3 COD Black Ops X-Mas Cheer brought to you from the mall!
If your eyes did NOT just bug out, and you did NOT get a sudden nervous rush of adrenaline and excitement after reading that headline and seeing that picture, then you are obviously NOT a teenage boy. Or a young adult male. Or a grown ass man that might even have a wife and kids.
All those letters and numbers in the above headline stand for: Modern Warfare 3, Call of Duty, Black Ops. It’s a video game. Well, it’s a series of video games. I used the 3 because it sounds like more. And these games are all about MORE. More guns. Bigger guns. Throwing knives. Stabbing things. I hear the words “quick scope no scope” practically every 10 minutes from one of my children and I have no idea what that means. It usually leads to yelling and screaming about cheating and ends with real-life combat and declarations that one is quitting and never playing that damn game again with the other one. At any rate, it’s really popular too. This is a Jeep that was actually produced because of the game. Apparently this exact Jeep is IN the game. And now you can buy it! And drive around in it. And people, like me, will take its picture and show their teenage son and adult brother-in-law and they will get all sweaty and freak out and say the exact same thing despite the 20 year age difference between them: “Oh man you saw one of these???” And they will take your phone and stare at the pictures all jittery and asking questions that you really don’t know the answers to because you are a female and couldn’t give a rat’s ass about a black Jeep with a special sticker on it. Ha. I kid. But then again, I really didn’t know about this Jeep until we saw it at the Arby’s the other day. I knew as I was taking the pictures that the owner was probably watching me from inside. He was. In fact, he was sitting at a table that was facing his Jeep. I knew it was him because of his location in the restaurant, the weird way he was looking at me as he was leaving and then because I watched him physically get into the Jeep and drive away. I made up an entire life story about him while we were sitting there after he left. He looked to be in the 30 to 40-ish year old age range. In my fake life for him he worked at the Best Buy. I made him a manager so it wouldn’t be so sad and my son said if that was true, that’s probably why he gets to play video games all day. He probably needs to be a bit older, and be a manager, because I just found out they cost about 40,000 dollars. (I know right? These video game accessories are getting way out of hand.) He probably has boys, and their dads, drooling and fawning all over that thing every time he parks it somewhere. In fact, before he left, an entire van of teenagers pulled up and they all walked around it, staring and talking, as they scattered to other parts of the parking lot.
So if you find yourself out today, and I hear there are a lot of crazies madly swarming the shopping areas in these last desperate hours, keep your eyes open and your camera ready and maybe you’ll see a Black Ops Jeep too! I’m taking my sighting as a sign of a prosperous New Year for people AND the world. I mean really, if we have money to blow on a custom Jeep from a video game, and the car company feels confident enough that if they build them we will buy them, things cannot be all that bad. At the very least you will make your son very happy! Dashboard. Black Ops out.
just shy of pretty 
Leave a Reply